Welcome to my world...

hei, stranger..

2011-10-01T22:55:00.001+07:00

You know? We used to be close but now i can't come near you. I feel insecure around you and kinda scared that you'd hurt my feelings and make me really dislike you. I don't want to dislike you, you're great, everyone like you, thats why i even don't want to dislike you even more. I hope you change but i have my doubts.

I know you miss me and i really miss you too but again... I'm scared that you'll hurt me (again) and make me dislike you (again). I'm sorry if i seem to be avoiding you. Its just that... I don't know if you've become mature enough to be my friend. You're still very young and i forgot about it every single time. Its my fault. I don't know how long are we still going to be friends but i guess we'll see.

Lets still be friends. :)

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twitter...

2011-08-09T20:59:00.001+07:00

"hai, selamat pagi, semangat selasa!"

"sahur2!" *twitpic menu sahur/rincian menu sahur*

"gile, hampir ketiduran ga sholat subuh.."

"bulan puasa boleh galau ga, sih?"
"batal ga sih klo galau?"

"panas/macet/bete banget!! >_<"

"buka puasa!! *twitpic/rincian menu buka puasa*"

"teraweh dulu, tweeps ( ' ' )/"

"aduh haus/laper nih! Ngemil dulu ah...xD"

"good night, tweeps. C u tomorrow!"

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galau

2011-08-03T22:43:00.001+07:00

Galau itu apa?

Gw sering banget liat di status twitter, ym, facebook klo pada 'galau'. Gw ga ngerti itu pada galau kenapa... Setelah beberapa hari ini dekat sama 'this guy' baru deh g ngerasain first hand gimana rasanya 'galau'. Tapi gw ga mau galau, gw maunya ngerasa secure. Kenapa cowok itu cuma mau invest usaha dalam sebuah pdkt sebanyak yang diinvest ceweknya dalam bentuk respon, gw kan jadi galau. :-\

Why does he seem so distance so suddence? Padahal i made that desicion after a very long thought (ya cuma selama shalat tarawih sih, sambil ngelamun), but still... Please be more adoring to me. I need it. :-/

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Cirebon Delight

2011-07-14T13:54:00.002+07:00

It's my turn now! Yoohoo!!

Trip kali sebenrnya penuh sensasi. Dari awal dah bikin gw stress bete tingkat tinggi krn pasti ada aj obstacle-nya.

1) Kehabisan tiket kereta.
Ga ada yg ngeh klo lg musim liburan sekolah... *mijit2 jidat* tiket all-reserved. Tp pas kemarinan liat di stasiun kyknya mereka pake last chance go-show, dpt apa engga urusan ntar, yg penting ngantri dulu. Even ada juga bule2 ngantri.

2) Natural Selection! Dr yg tdnya ber-7, tinggal ber-4 yg pergi.
Waktu perginya ga pernah ngepas, selalu ngundur2..dah kayak undur2.. Bisa di-cek ulang di email, yg bisa cabs tgl tersebut hanya ber-4...akhirnya komunikasi stop lewat email, jd lewat tlp.

3) Many little disputes.
Dari gw yg disputes ma schedule di kantor ma temen2 gw sampe lil disputes mslh schedule kereta, beli tiketnya, cara bayar tiket kereta, de el el... Walah.. Pengen rasanya gw jedukin pala gw ke tembok.

4) Berangkat dpt tiket bisnis, pulang eksekutif.
Cabs berempat dpt tiket bisnis, sempet shock liat kondisi dalam kereta. Tp dah pasrah.. Untung kursinya gede bisa hadap2an..gosip n leha2 tetap berlangsung.. Kaca jendela kereta yg super buram n ada yg retak. Ga nyaman sebenrnya tp dah bodo amat. 3 jam perjalanan, sejam gosip 2 jam tidur.

5) Nyari lokasi hotel lewat google maps.
Stlh nyampe di stasiun, tasha ma nechan ngantri resv buat beli tiket pulang esok hari. Tdnya mrk mo cabs by bus to sukabumi, tp plan changed. Pas mereka ngantri beli tiket, gw ma jun nyari lokasi hotel yg dah di-booking lewat google maps. Klo diliat dr g-map, sepertinya jauh.. Qta dah siap2 mental buat kaki.. Jun dpt infor dr hotelnya jarak tempuh 10 menit dr stasiun ke hotel. Alamat hotel di Jalan Siliwangi yg tnyta tuh jalan ada di depan stasiun *gubrag*
Ada org yg blg, "mba, tinggal belok kanan aja ya.. Itu hotel2 dah bnyk spanjang jalan"
Pas dah belok kanan, jalan bbrp langkah, tnyta hotel dah di depan mata!! Buseett..deket bgt!! Ini mah bukan 10 menit!! Ngesot tinggal nyampe. More surprisingly, hotelnya PW abezz!! Super nyaman! Kamar mandinya juga keren!! Meskipun qta ditempatin kamar yg didepannya pohon beringin gede yg rindang yg akarnya kemana2..agak horor sih.

6) Jalan kaki super paaannjaaanngg.. Jauh, man!
Janjian ma kyoko ketemuan di Grage Mall.. Nyari ni mall ampun2an dah.. Di tengah jalan ketemu Maicih.. Tasha jun rere langsung nyerbu beli 4 pack..

7) Grage Mall = Mall ribet!
Baru kali ini gw nemu mall segitu pusingnya di dalem. Peletakan counter2nya ga banget. Lo kayak masuk Maze.. Qta nyari Nasi Gamblang (makanan khas sana) pusing bgt.

8) Berantem ma tukang becak.
setelah ketemuan ma dudi+kyoko di grage mall, qta mo makan Seafood. Dudi nyaranin naik becak, bayarnya Rp.3000. Qta naik 2 becak, gw ma jun duluan, tasha ma rere di belakang qta. Pas turun si abang becak gw protes minta dibayar 5000. Padahal si abang becak tasha ga protes. Tp gara2 si abang becak gw provokatif, jdnya 2-2nya minta tambah 2000. Tdnya gw mo ngasih, jd males. I personally don't like the way they ask. Dia terang2an minta nambah coz dia tau gw turis. Akhirnya gw kekeh ga gw kasih. Dasar korup. Ga tukang becak, ga pemerintah tukang korup.

9) Dudi orgnya asik.
Tnyta dudi bisa masuk ma qta2.. Doi juga suka kokoreaan.. Even doi sotoy promosiin Beast ke tasha nechan ma jun.. Gw cut aja, "di, mereka bertiga ini dah super expert."

10) Pulang kereta Eksekutif.
Gw ma jun naik kereta 06:15 eksekutif. Krn gw kan langsung kerja masuk siang.
Tnyat kereta eksekutif itu emng nyaman abes.. Gw udah mo tidur disana ya langsung bobo.. Trus gw pake dpt 'kursi ajaib'. Kursinya loss, jd pas gw nyender tu kursi malah turun kebelakang otomatis. Klo ga gw senderin, tu kursi balik lagi ke posisi awal. Gw jadiin mainan deh ma Jun.. ‎ƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑ"̮. Lumayaann..pagi2 nge-joke ma kursi.

11) Nahan laper dlm kereta.
Krn gw inget kata2 kyoko pas doi beli nasi goreng di kereta harganya 20rb dan ga enak pula, gw tahan2 perut gw buat sabar sampe gambir. اَلْحَمْدُلِلّهِ , td dah disumpel ma roti satu.

12) Ke Cafe n Kenalan ma backpackers Malaysia.
Turun kereta gw+jun lsg ngehajar cafe. Harganya maharani boooo.. Tp biarlah.. Laper.. Dan tnyta enak juga.
Pas masuk cafe gw emng ngeliat ada 5 cowo tinggi2 n keren. Gw pikir itu cowo2 Indonesia.. gw ma jun makan aj coz perut qta dah nyanyi X-Japan ma Laruku. Pas lg asik2 konsentrasi makan, salah satu dr 5 cowo2 itu yg agak hitam n bergimbal nyamperin qt, n nanya2 ttg bandung. Dan gw baru tau pas doi speak, itu logat melayu. "Wah, org malaysia nih." Kt gw dlm hati.
Krn doi ramah n sopan, gw jd ga enak, gw dah liat2an ma Jun.. Sebenrnya qta dah pake tampang "Do-Not-Disturb-Us", tp krn tuh gimbal emng muka tembok, tetep nyamperin. Padahal gw ma jun dah blg, qta ga tau ttg bandung. Tp doi tetep nyari2 topik. Krn gw ma jun laper n cape, sbnrnya ga gitu nge-respons or semangat nanggepin doi. Doi super confidence, supel n easy-going bgt, jdnya mungkin mau ga mau gw+jun tpaksa kebawa juga. Gw malah tdnya mikir, "wuidiihh..jun keren bgt, ngerti apa yg doi omongin." Coz tuh gimbal logat melayunya kental bgt!! Gw sedikit yakin doi kayaknya suka ma jun, coz natapnya Jun mlulu..bwahahahaha...nyari opini ma Jun dulu..cieee cieee kiwkiw..
Awalnya gw ga semangat. Pas gw tau, itu ada temennya yg keren abis n tampan, gw langsung semangat, sebelah gw kan kaca, lsg liat kaca , "do I look bad?".‎ƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑ"̮ Tp sayang doi pendiem abis... Susah deh. Tdnya gw speak doank mo minta fb-nya tuh gimbal, sebenrnya gw mo minta fb-nya temennya..tp saat itu koneksi bb gw lg sangat tidak suportif ma gw, gagal deh dapetin tuh fb-nya yg cute.

Akhirnya tuh wingko gw kasih aja ma tuh org2 melayu. Gw cabs ke kantor, Jun ke bogor..

13) Nasib Tasha ma Nechan.
Tasha ma nechan akhirnya dpt kereta jam 10 yg eksekutif, tp tnyta doi kena trouble gangguan rel tengah jalan akhirnya nyampe di gambir jadi lama bgt!! Gw mikir اَلْحَمْدُلِلّهِ gw ambil kereta pertama, ntar gimana nasib gw ya klo ada kejadian gitu, bisa kena nih ma org2 kantor. ‎ƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑ"̮
Tp tasha ma nechan, pulangnya malah having fun ke matsuri di blok m langsung nonton movie. That's good for you ladies setelah terjebak dalam kereta, thanks اَللّهُ lo dpt eksekutif, klo dpt bisnis lg gimane nasib lo ya.. ‎ƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑƗƗɑ"̮ trus pas di kantor, kerjaan gw membludak, yg seharusnya gw pulang jam 11pm, jd pulang jam 1am.. Capeeeeee..

Alright, sekian dulu deh resume trip dr gw... Waktunya gw balik kerja..

Sweet Regards,
Septi

a quote from a book

2011-07-12T14:59:00.001+07:00

Saya cinta keluarga saya, saya cinta sahabat dan teman-teman saya. Tapi saya juga cinta diri saya. Karenanya menikmati waktu dengan diri sendiri. Berteman dengan diri sendiri. Berdialog panjang dengan diri sendiri. Buat saya bukan merupakan pilihan, tapi keharusan.

Apalagi sebenarnya di ujung hidup ini ada kematian.
Sesuatu yang harus benar-benar dijalani sendirian.
Tanpa teman.

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Boys.... Not Men.

2011-07-02T20:25:00.000+07:00

Jadi ceritanya gw tadi abis nyalon dan makan bubur sama Sari dan kita langsung ngomongin topik universal semua cewek, boys. Jadi ceritanya dia cerita tentang cowok-cowok yang suka sama dia dan gw juga curhat tentang cowok (ga plural -sigh-) dan gw menyimpulkan kalau memang ada tipe cowok (banyak!) yang sepertinya sangat pede kalau mereka nunjukin rasa suka mereka sama cewek yang mereka minati, secara otomatis cewek itu akan merespon positif dan langsung mau jadi pacar mereka. Sering terjadi, baru juga kenal, langsung tembak pedekate dan langsung cerita sana sini kalau mereka dah jadian sama cewek yang mereka suka atau demand dimengerti sama cewek yang mereka suka padahal yang suka juga siapaaaa, yang mau siapaaa, yang ngotot siapa. Ckck. Padahal cewek yang dimaksud belum suka dan belum tentu bakalan suka!

Boys, get your fact straight!

Something I feel.

2011-05-23T11:30:00.000+07:00

My love life is just so so..

Ga kayak Nanda yang love life-nya agak ekstrim (menurut gw), love life gw standar, biasa aja, dingin... Karena gw belum ketemu cowok yang bisa bikin gw bener2 suka sama dia. Gw pernah nemu cowok yang bisa bikin gw head over heels sama dia, tapi pada akhirnya gw tetep restrain diri sendiri dari rasa suka berlebihan karena ni cowok udah merit dan istrinya dah punya anak 1 bahkan lagi hamil juga. Gw respect sama cowok ini karena dia bilang terus terang kalau dia ga bisa sama gw karena dia udah punya istri dan anak. Sampai akhirnya gw bikin ni cowok semacam patokan kalau gw punya cowok gw pengennya yang kayak gini : chemistry-nya cocok dan setia.

Tapi baru-baru ini (hari kamis kemarin), ada kejadian super aneh. Waktu itu gw lagi tidur di bus jemputan Pemda kan tuh trus sepanjang ingatan gw, yang duduk di sebelah gw itu ibu2. Pas gw tiba-tiba kebangun di tengah jalan, ada cowok yang duduk di sebelah gw. Ketika gw melek, ni cowok tiba-tiba aja ngomong kalau dia suka sama gw dan ngajakin gw jadian. Gw duduk dengan wajah bengong. Ini gw mimpi atau ni cowok rada sinting ya?! Gw bahkan baru sekali itu liat mukanya!

Bahkan sebelum dia memperkenalkan diri kalau dia itu namanya blablabla, kerja di bagian blablabla, basa basi blablabla, dia udah ngajakin gw jadian! Dan agak maksa pula nanya gw jadi ama dia atau ga. Aneh banget ni orang. Namanya aja gw yang mesti nanya, kerja dibagian mana, umurnya, riwayat kerjanya gw yang nanya, bahkan no hp pun gw yang sediain pulpen dan kertas karena dia ga pegang hp. Kalau diurut2 kayak gini gw malah jadi bersyukur ni orang ga jadi nelp gw. Sumpah ya ni orang aneh banget!

Gw belum pacaran-pacaran lagi saat ini bukan karena ga ada yang mau sama gw... bisa dibilang gw orangnya agak picky. Gw udah dalam masa-masa ketika gw nemu seorang cowok yang dalam pikiran gw itu bukan lagi buat pacaran, tapi buat merit. Liat jangka panjangnya lah. Nah kalau gw ga ngerasa match sama cowoknya, gw liat jangka panjangnya. Ga bakalan mau gw pacaran ma tu orang in the first place. Cari masalah doang itu mah. Buang-buang waktu juga karena siapa tau pas gw lagi membuang2 waktu dan makan ati serta perasaan ketika pacaran sama cowok yang ga match sama gw, the right guy is looking away cos I'm taken. #halah.

Masalah cowok ini sebenernya bukan masalah besar buat gw. Gw ga gitu mikirin cowok, merit, punya anak, dst. Yang mikirin itu nyokap gw. Dia dah dalam tahap 'maksa' supaya gw punya cowok, merit, punya anak, dst, padahal kan yang ngejalanin itu gw. Dasar ibu-ibu. Padahal I have plans! I wanna go to HongKong next year, pinjaman gw ke bank bakalan lunas tahun depan yang berarti I can enjoy my full salary (bertahun-tahun gaji PTT, baru sekali ini dapat gaji 'normal' masa gw ga nikmatin dulu sebelum harus habis buat biaya popok bayi?!), I wanna buy lots of stuff and go places! Mumpung masih bisa!

Satu hal lagi... gw ga ngerti kenapa cowok bisa cepet banget suka sama gw.

Why?!

They didn't even know who I am. Mereka emangnya tau kalau gw tuh orangnya dingin dan agak kasar? Taunya cuma 'baik' doang. 'Baik' doang itu ga cukup, tau ga sih?!

Ibarat kata, kalau misalnya level suka gw masih -5, level suka tu cowok udah sampe +25 emangnya bakalan ngaruh gitu? Gw malah males kali. Creepy!

Well, segitu aja lah rants gw tentang cowok. Males gw.

facebook chat

2011-05-05T17:22:00.002+07:00

Dia : Reni
Gw : Halo
Dia : Kmana aj
Gw : ga kemana2 sih disini aja
Dia : sehat?
Gw : sehat dong
Dia : Sukur

Dh pnya co? 

Gw : kenapa nanya?

Dia : Mau daftar

Gw : yaelah :))

Dia : Hehe

Gw : maunya ak komen apaan?

Dia : Trserah

Gw : hahah

Dia : Jah,mlah ktwa dia

Gw : ya trus gimana dong?

Dia : Bleh apa gag bleh gtu

Gw : wah ga tau gw

eh lho kok pake gw

sorrry2

sebenernya kenapa sih? mendadak amat

Dia : Ya gpp

Ya gpp..c,ea c emg gag sharusnya scpet itu

Santai aj lha..di pkirin mteng2 aj dlu 

Gw : hadooohhh.. :))

Dia : Hehe..

Wanna hear a funny story? 'Dia' ini dulu my high school crush. Dulu gw pernah bilang suka ama dia dan gw ditolak aja dong dong ah! Sekarang?

Errr... Dulu kenapa gw sempet suka ama dia ya? :-?

Emak-emak jaman sekarang...

2011-05-05T15:13:00.001+07:00

Iye gw tau gw tukang komen, apaaaaa aja dikomenin. Abisnya orang-orang disekitar gw either ga ngerti apa yang gw komenin atau emang ga peduli sama komen-komen gw yang emang terkesan nyinyir. So, yang bakalan gw komenin sekarang adalah tentang emak-emak jaman sekarang. Gw dah dalam umur yang cocok jadi emak-emak (iya, gw mengakui kan nih?) dan ga boong kalau gw katakan gw dah tertarik dan pengen survey gitu for what its like to live as a married couple and to be a mom. Jadi ceritanya karena hari ini hujan seharian dan ga ada kerjaan sama sekali, akhirnya gw bukalah itu forum mommiesdaily yang sepaket sama femaledaily yang klo di-combine ada di fashionesedaily. Berhubung gw ikutan itu forum dan kemaren ikutan gathnya (untuk tutorial hijab gitu, ya gw ikutanlah dan ternyata yang ikutan umurnya cukup variatif kok ga cuma emak-emak yang bawa anak, tapi ya keliatan banget klo disana yang paling muda itu sekitar seumuran gw), gw jadi bongkar-bongkar lah itu forum dan mulai baca-baca thread yang paling ga pernah gw sentuh : mommiesdaily.

Isinya cukup menarik, seputar curhatan yang selalu gw denger dari sepupu-sepupu gw yang rata-rata dah pada merit. Berhubung bokap dan nyokap gw nikahnya disaat umur mereka berdua dah cukup telat, sepupu-sepupu gw umurnya jauh banget dari gw. Malah ada sepupu gw yang umurnya dah cocok buat jadi bokap gw (eurg!). Mereka kalau lagi berkeluh kesah biasanya ga jauh-jauh dari urusan pembantu ama baby sitter yang ga pernah betah dan selalu ganti-ganti mulu, susahnya cari pembantu ama baby sitter yang jago dan jujur, kejelekan masing-masing pembantu dan baby sitter baik yang masih kerja maupun yang udah resign, gosip keluarga, urusan sekolah anak, dan lain seterusnya. Sumpah ya gw pas baca-baca itu forum gw berasa kek denger suara satu orang sepupu gw in particular yang punya 2 orang pembantu dan 2 orang baby sitter. Persis!

Trus pas gw baca-baca tentang sekolah anak (yang lagi populer itu thread-thread yang membahas tentang SD, ketauan disana itu yang kebanyakan join forumnya itu rata-rata young moms--ya iyalah klo dah tua biasanya ga ngerti internet juga gitu) dan gw in shock ngeliat kriteria sekolah yang dibahas para 'young moms' ini. Diutamakan : bilingual school. Oh astaga.... Ya iya lah gw ngerti itu forum isinya para ibu-ibu yang intinya mampu untuk menyekolahkan anak mereka dimana pun yang mereka mau, tapi kenapa harus bilingual coba? Sering ga sih lo masuk ke mal (PIM, uhuk) dan ngeliat ibu-ibu dengan 2 anak disertai baby sitter masing-masing 1 dimana anak-anak mereka itu bahkan ga ngerti bahasa indonesia (alias cuma bisa bahasa inggris) dan para baby sitternya sendiri jago berbahasa inggris? I mean, wow! Waktu gw lagi ikutan gath yang kemaren itu beberapa ibu-ibunya bawa anak-anak mereka dan klo ngomong sama anaknya mereka pake bahasa inggris aja gitu lhoooo... (Suer, gw pengen punya anak for that reason only! So I can talk to them using English... hahah ga banget ya?)

Lalu gw meneruskan membaca sebuah thread yang dulu pernah gw baca dan ga bisa gw lupa ampe sekarang (ampe dibuka lagi tadi dalam rangka menganggur ria) yaitu thread 'Monthly Expenses Household' alias Pengeluaran Bulanan Rumah Tangga. Disitu kita ga bisa ga melongo baca pengeluaran para ibu-ibu yang pede sharing expenses mereka di sebuah open forum. Mereka rata-rata expensesnya 10-20 juta aja gitu lhooooo.... Bagi yang single expensesnya antara 5-10 juta. Gila ya gw pengen deh punya income sebanyak itu biar bisa dikeluarin sebanyak itu juga HAHAH! Tapi emang gila sih basic necessities di Jakarta itu, seperti listrik, air, telpon, kontrakan rumah (klo masih ngontrak), cicilan rumah (klo kredit rumah), bensin, parkir, tol (klo punya motor/mobil), internet, cable TV (klo ga puas nonton sinetron seharian), biaya belanja makanan dan kebutuhan rumah bulanan (groceries), cicilan kartu kredit (klo punya), gaji pembantu (klo ada), biaya hura-hura kek shopping atau jalan-jalan, dst. Ini kalau belum punya anak ya? Klo punya anak ya pastinya lo bakalan nambah sama biaya susu, diaper, sekolahnya, baju-baju anak, makanannya, klo dah gede tambah biaya lain-lain kek dia pasti butuh komputer/laptop, les-les, instrumen klo mau belajar musik, Hp, dst.

Ini gw lampirin salah satu postingan yang sebenernya cukup realistis dan menggambarkan pengeluaran bulanan keluarga kelas menengah di Jakarta:

listrik : 200rb
PAM : 100rb
telp : 200rb
pembantu : 400rb
iuran RT : 65rb
susu anak : 800-900rb
belanja bulanan (buat q, anak, pembantu) : 500rb
belanja harian (include gas, beras & aqua galon) : 700-800rb
tol+bensin (rumah, kantor & jalan2) : 900rb-1jt
cc : 2jt
mkn diluar+shopping :750rb-1jt

Segini aja dah 6 juta lho. Ini kayaknya anaknya masih baby jadi belum include sama biaya sekolah anak dan transportasi sama jajannya anak kalau anaknya dah sekolah.

Hih! Liat ini rasanya gw ga jadi pengen tinggal di Jakarta.

PNS? I hate it!!!

2011-04-29T11:17:00.000+07:00

So when I was checking my twitter timeline this morning, I find out that @mrshananto, the famous financial planner on twitter, is tweeting about PNS... and their salary. Being a PNS, I read all her tweets (naturally).

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Good morning tweeps! Selama PNS dibayar spt buruh, selama itu jg mrk kerja gak ky abdi negara ;)

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
@matasapi ridiculous salary of 1mio/mo, how do u expect people to work properly? Kl buruh ada overtime, freshgrad ada career move, PNS?

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
I'm happy to see progress. PNS ada yg gajinya udh 12jutaan - special cases. Paling gak u org itu bisa hidup layak. But majority struggles

AiIsFachri FACHRI HARIZONA
@mrshananto emang 2,4 ++ itu gaji buruh ya mba ?

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
@AiIsFachri buruh dg overtime bs besar dr itu :(

I was like : !!!!!!

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
@matasapi jengkel liat "sabetan" itu. Kl mau korupsi hilang, "survival mode" nya jg hrs hilang. Mau gak mau salary structure hrs bgs jg

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
2juta? RT @tonymarpaung: PNS yg take home pay 1jt tamatan SMP/SMA. klo sarjana pasti lbh besar

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Di mana? Msk yg special cases Deplu Pajak gt? Pemda gak segitu RT @tonymarpaung: 4-5 jt. fresh graduate. hampir sama dgn swasta kan?

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
A true reform will be reform in PNS remuneration package. Who will be the next president to do that? ;)

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Nice, not enough RT @dewi_boiman: polisi baru gajinya uudah lbh dr 1jt koq win,tamatan SMA,kt nya sih biar gak 'cari' keluar

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
RT @lindarosiyani: di puskesmas jakarta utara cpns gapok 1,4 (80%) dan kalau udah pns bisa dapat 4jt an..

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Ouch :( RT @amandasoebadi: guru honorer SD negri, fulltime gajinya cm 800rb! Memang sih "honorer," but that's less than my maid's salary!

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
True but we got start somewhere RT @efmirza: Jml PNS terlalu bnyk, beban kerja tdk merata, kalo gaji besar terlalu bebani APBN

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Nah gaji buruh dong, beda tipis sm UMR RT @aditasno: masa sih?Di standar biaya umum kementerian se-Indonesia 1.375.000 kok.

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Betul tp jdnya kt bs blg 'gak ada alasan lo' RT @rseptiani: kemenkeu udah dari 2006, tp org pajak yg stdnya paling tinggi tetep aja korup, makin parah malah.

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Liat lg: " Selama PNS dibayar spt buruh, selama itu jg mrk kerja gak ky abdi negara" jd kl ada yg gaji udh ok, kt bs nuntut kerja lbh bagus!

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
I've said it many times. Finance is foundation to political thinking. Gak bs mikirin korupsi tanpa mikirin PNS itu gajinya udh layak apa blm

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
RT @admonike: PNS dianggap padat karya, hire tll byk u nampung pengangguran akhirnya gaji kcl. Mesti kelola scr prof. Hire sesuai kemampuan

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Gw pernah ya ada klien PNS dokter mengeluh gaji kcl. Sm QMPlanner ditanya : terus knp msh terus jd PNS? Akhirnya dia keluar :p *colek klien*

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
RT @dbrahmantyo: saat ini yg sdh mendapatkan remunerasi dgn pendekatan prestasi kerja ada: Kemenkeu, BPK, MA, Setneg dan Sekkab (1)

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
@efmirza @Rustini tugas negara menyediakan lap.kerja itu dg regulasi & swasta bukan dg PNS

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
RT @astie92: PNS yg hidup di kota besar spt Jkt mungkin majority struggles ttp yg di kota kecil mrk hidup cukup layak dan berkecukupan

again : !!!!!!!

mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
@mbaknana ada PNS yg gajinya udh 5jt, 12jt, bukan pejabat tinggi. Pendekatan gaji berdasar review kerjaan
mrshananto Ligwina Hananto
Love the fact that a lot of you CARE about PNS salary & corruption. There's hope for this country's future. We will take a different stand

Sumpah ya gw baca ini rasanya pengen nangis!!!

My salary is really-really low. Ini kerja di daerah yang katanya adalah terluas se-Jawa-Bali (bangga lagi!!! Apa yang mau dibanggain sih sebenernya?! Luas wilayah?! Bukan kinerja?!) ya wajar aja klo jumlah PNS-nya banyak, beban kerja ga merata, PAD-nya ga merata karena daerah yang berbatasan dengan Kota Sukabumi dan Kabupaten Bogor pasti lebih banyak PAD-nya daripada daerah yang bener-bener jauh di daerah selatan seperti Jampang, Surade, dst.

Gaji gw waktu jadi honorer lulusan SMA : Rp. 300.000,- (Pengen nangis klo diinget sekarang) padahal sebelumnya gw kerja di Jakarta dapet gaji dua kali lipat dari itu, untuk lulusan SMA!!

Dua tahun berikutnya, gaji gw naik (nunggu dua tahun!! Honorer lain mesti nunggu ampe 10 tahun kali!!) jadi Rp. 500.000,- Cukup? Ini bahkan lebih kecil dari pada gaji buruh di pabrik-pabrik sekitaran Kabupaten, FYI. Ketika gaji gw naik, UMR buruh swasta itu Rp. 600.000,- dengan overtime mereka bisa dapet Rp. 1.000.000,- dengan mudah. PNS? Ada sistem overtime? Hahah! You kidding me? We don't even have THR. Yes! Ketika swasta diregulasi diwajibkan untuk memberikan pegawainya THR dengan itungan 1 bulan gaji, PNS tidak diberikan kemewahan yang sama. Alasannya : 'kan udah ada gaji ke-13...' I say : MAKAN TUH GAJI KE 13! Biar gimana pun, alasan ada gaji ke 13 adalah untuk membantu para PNS untuk menyediakan pendidikan yang baik untuk anak-anaknya, makanya gaji ke 13 sekitar bulan Juni biar pas dengan waktu masuk sekolah. Lah, terus pas lebaran dikiranya kita disuruh makan nasi aking?! Dah tau pas lebaran semua barang harganya naik! Trus apa yang terjadi? Sistem survival masuk. Kebanyakan tujuan korupsi yang sistemnya sentralisasi (iya, bener sentralisasi! Klo menurut salah satu mantan rekan kerja gw yang dah pensiun, korupsi berjamaah) itu adalah untuk menyediakan para pegawai masing-masing kantor ketika waktu lebaran tiba. Kita kan lebaran ga cuma sekali, dua kali sama lebaran idul adha. Sumpah, ya ini lebaran ga ada halal2nya sedikit pun.

Ketika gw akhirnya diangkat jadi PNS berkat aturan dari Gus Dur (ya sebenernya ga mungkin pemda terus-terusan mengadakan sistem honorer, dan ga mungkin kan honorer semua dipecat, ya akhirnya harus diangkat semua jadi PNS secara berkala), tau gaji gw berapa? Rp. 1.200.000,- Puas? Oh, tentu tidak.
Hampir semua orang yang diangkat bareng sama gw ketika itu gajinya JAUH diatas gw. Bahkan yang sama-sama golongan II/a (karena gw MASIH lulusan SMA ketika diangkat) pun gajinya diatas gw. Kenapa? Karena mereka punya tunjangan istri/suami dan anak. Gw yang masih single tunjangan keluarganya ya 0 dong. Trus tunjangan beras dihitung perjiwa jadi ya jiwanya cuma 1 ya diitungnya 1, padahal gw nanggung kehidupan seluruh keluarga gw yang itungannya adalah ya orang tua gw. Padahal, kalau mau main itung-itungan.... Kinerja gw dibanding semua honorer yang diangkat bareng sama gw di kantor yang sama digabungin jadi satu masih mending kinerja gw. JAUH! Buktinya gw masih CPNS tapi dah disuruh jadi Bendahara Pengeluaran (keputusan yang gw sesali kenapa gw setujui sampe sekarang). Untuk jadi Bendahara Pengeluaran itu ga mudah. Butuh kemampuan dan kepercayaan dari atasan. Terbukti biarpun gw punya kemampuan dan kepercayaan dari atasan, will power gw minus, jadi gw batal meneruskan jadi Bendahara. Cukup 8 bulan aja. 8 month of hell, i tell ya!

Sekarang ada kenaikan gaji pula 10% dan tinggal 1 kali naik gaji lagi 5% gaji PNS naik 100% dari semenjak orde baru (kasian banget ya?) Tau gaji gw berapa? Rp. 1.400.000,- itu gw masih CPNS 80% belum 100%. Kurang? BANGET! FYI, Ayu yang kerja di perusahaan asing itu dapet Rp. 5.000.000,- BERSIH sebulan. Lian yang jadi dosen di Binus? Kurang lebih sama. Gw? Minder gigit bantal. Karena gw yakin dan percaya sama diri sendiri kalau sebenernya gw bisa dapet penghasilan yang kurang lebih sama dengan mereka. Hanya karena ketika gw terjebak jadi PNS gw belum punya ijazah S1 sehingga gw harus struggle jadi honorer sampai akhirnya gw dapet ijazah S1 gw ketika gw sudah jadi CPNS. Padahal kalau gw masih belum diangkat ketika gw lulus S1, gw rencananya mau quit my job and move back to Jakarta and start making a better living.

Kenapa orang pengen jadi PNS? Karena kerjaannya santai, pensiun terjamin dan jaminan ga akan pernah dipecat kecuali jika kena kasus super berat (misalnya masuk penjara atau kasus narkoba dan korupsi yang diekspos media. Kalo ga diekspos media, masuk penjara karena kasus narkoba pun ga akan dipecat. Contoh kasus: it really did happen to someone at my office). Padahal kenyataannya menurut sudut pandang gw sebagai PNS : kerjaan santai tapi semakin santai anda berarti semakin sedikit duit anda dan semakin jelas betapa anda sangat tidak berguna di kantor. Semakin sibuk berarti semakin banyak kerjaan yang berarti semakin banyak honor dari kegiatan sana sini dan pembuktian bahwa kantor bisa ga jalan cuma gara-gara anda ga masuk sehari. Semakin sibuk = semakin penting posisinya di kantor (biarpun bukan pejabat tapi cuma pelaksana, malah justru biasanya yang cuma pelaksana itu yang paling sibuk sekantor dan paling dicari-cari dan duitnya bisa yang paling banyak dibanding pelaksana atau pejabat lain).

Pensiun terjamin? Hah! Pensiun itu kecil jumlahnya. Apalagi kalau anda pensiun disaat belom jadi apa-apa. Cuma tetep jadi pelaksana dari sejak masuk sampe pensiun (banyak banget yang kayak gitu, emang ga punya ambisi aja kali atau karena ga punya kenalan pejabat meureun). Ini peraturan terbaru tentang besaran pensiun PNS : UU No. 11 Tahun 1969 tentang Pensiun Pegawai dan Pensiun Janda/Duda Pegawai

Pasal 11
Besarnya pensiun pegawai.

(1) Besarnya pensiun pegawai sebulan adalah 2 ½ % (dua setengah
perseratus) dari dasar pensiun untuk tiap-tiap tahun masa kerja, dengan
ketentuan bahwa :

a. pensiun pegawai sebulan adalah sebanyak-banyaknya 75 % (tujuh
puluh lima perseratus) dan sekurang-kurangnya 40 % (empat puluh
perseratus) dari dasar pensiun;

b. pensiun pegawai sebulan dalam hal termaksud dalam pasal 9 ayat
(1) huruf b Undang-undang ini adalah sebesar 75 % (tujuh puluh lima
perseratus) dari dasar pensiun;

c. pensiun pegawai sebulan tidak boleh kurang dari gaji pokok terendah
menurut Peraturan Pemerintah tentang gaji dan pangkat yang
berlaku bagi pegawai negeri yang bersangkutan

Lalu dasar pensiun itu apa? Berdasarkan pasal 5 dari UU yang sama :

Pasal 5

Tentang dasar pensiun.

Dasar pensiun yang dipakai untuk menentukan besarnya pensiun,
ialah gaji pokok (termasuk gaji pokok tambahan dan/atau gaji pokok
tambahan peralihan) terakhir sebulan yang berhak diterima oleh pegawai
yang berkepentingan berdasarkan peraturan gaji yang berlaku baginya.

Seandainya lo pensiun dengan gaji bersih sebesar Rp. 3.521.000,- pun itu bukan gaji gaji pokoknya lho. Itu dah termasuk tunjangan keluarga, tunjangan pajak, tunjangan beras, dsb. Palingan gaji pokok lo sekitar Rp. 2.283.000,- dan 75% nya adalah Rp. 1.712.250,-. Segitu gw masukin gaji salah satu pegawai kantor gw yang kebetulan adalah pejabat. Bayangin kalau yang pensiun adalah pelaksana seumur-umur dengan gaji bersih sebesar 2jutaan. Gaji pokoknya palingan cuma 1,2jt-an dan dia cuma nerima pensiun 900rb-an/bulan. Bayangin pas pensiun itu para PNS itu masih punya anak yang masih kuliah, masih sekolah dengan jumlah anak diatas 2 orang. Cukup? Mau ngarepin pensiun? Seriously? Sementara temen-temen gw yang lain bisa ngatur pension plan dengan asuransi dan bisa dapetin pensiun hari tua dari asuransi itu berkali-kali lipat dari yang diperoleh PNS.

Dibilang ga puas, iya gw ga puas. Banyak hal yang harus diperhatikan sementara gw ngerasa pemerintahan itu baik legislatif maupun eksekutif kadang bertindak super childish yang cuma mentingin diri sendiri dan agak clueless sambil meraba-raba tanpa sadar kalau ada 250juta jiwa dibelakang mereka, mengekor dan mengikuti mereka. Setiap aturan yang mereka buat, setiap keputusan yang mereka buat itu menentukan sekitar 250juta jiwa itu. Don't even get me started with the DPR RI and the DPRD member who is so called the people representative. Yea, right. Mereka tujuannya cuma satu kok : balik modal. Udah. Sukur-sukur bisa dipilih ulang pas pemilihan berikutnya. Mana sih mereka pernah mikirin orang-orang yang mereka wakilin?

Ah, capek gw! I'm stuck here.

Tolong lah itu remunerisasi diberlakukan segera. I want what is rightfully mine. I don't want this 'rajin males sama aja' thingy. I seriously don't. If I work hard, I want to be acknowledge. Is it so hard?

Kau tahu?

2011-04-28T22:32:00.000+07:00

Aku bosan.
Sejujurnya kukatakan kalau aku ini sedang bosan.
Aku ingin melakukan sesuatu.
Kenapa aku tidak bergerak.
Kau tahu?

Aku ingin berbicara denganmu, merajut kata dan membuat kenangan.
Kenyataannya? Kau selalu mengacuhkanku. Membuatku kesal.
Aku ini bukan pajangan, bukan pula pemain figuran.
Apa karena aku kurang memperhatikanmu?
Atau karena aku terlalu memperhatikanmu?
Aku kurang menyenangkan?
Sedikit freaky?

Well, I'd love to tell you that I was born this way a la Lady Gaga but the truth is, I am only adjusting to the people I'm facing.
U sucks, dearest.

Aku bosan.
Kau tahu?

Aku ingin bermain, tapi kau tak peduli.

Tapi yah... memangnya siapa yang peduli padaku?
Toh dari awal aku juga tidak peduli kepada siapapun.
Why should they care?

Aku ingin kembali sibuk.
Aku ingin kembali hanya peduli pada diriku sendiri dan hal-hal disekitarku.
Aku ingin dikangeni.
Apa itu berarti aku harus menghilang dulu?
Wah, padahal aku tidak harus jauh untuk terasa jauh.
Kenyataannya, aku memang jauh biarpun kita sedang berdiri bersebelahan.

Sudahlah.

Mari kembali ke kenyataan.

Kenyataan bahwa kebanyakan cowok itu memang jarang ada yang punya niat yang benar.
Masa mau temenan aja ngajak make out dulu?
Kampret emang!

Butuh Distraction

2011-04-25T21:50:00.000+07:00

Kau tahu? Ketika kau merasa sedikit left out dan tidak nyambung dengan teman-temanmu dan mulai meributkan hal tersebut di dalam kepalamu?

Kupikir itu waktunya cari-cari kerjaan yang bisa bikin sibuk. Itu tandanya saya kurang kerjaan dan mulai mikirin yang nggak-nggak.

Okeh! Let's get busy! *celingukan cari sapu ma lap pel*

Saying NO!

2011-04-17T19:38:00.000+07:00

It's hard you know, to say no.

I found that I admire people who have the guts to say no to whatever that they're not pleased with. Its a rare kind of people. Harus dilestarikan. Lol! I know a few people who say 'no' with no doubt. One of them is Sigi. This girl is really one of a kind. She's not afraid of people not liking her if she say 'no' to whatever it is that is not comfortable to her. Even if people thinks she's annoying, I think she would just say "by all means! Go ahead. Hate me." People respect her cos she has the guts to speak up her mind. Some are envious (that would be me).

I have this need to be likable. Another thing is, I don't want to get into trouble. I also don't want to have enemies. I have this kind of attitude for years! Its killing me in the inside, honestly. Now I know better. I feel like if I don't say 'no', I'd be torture inside out! So I say 'no' at times, and I can't say 'no' at times. Depends on who's asking.

Just having the guts to say NO! Would save you, you know?

change

2011-04-15T01:24:00.002+07:00

Jadi ceritanya gw mengamati pasangan2 yang ada di sekitar gw, juga tipe2 orang yang lagi pdkt ma gw. Ada 1 hal yang menarik perhatian gw: they are trying to 'change' their partner to what they think is better/best for them.

Gw ga ngerti. Mungkin agak freak tapi selama gw punya pacar, ga pernah sekalipun gw berusaha mengubah cowok gw atau komplain tentang apapun. Mungkin bagi mantan2 gw, gw terkesan cuek atau ga peduli, juga buat orang2 di sekitar gw tapi... The truth is, i just don't want to change them. In return, i don't want to be changed by them. In my mind, if u are willing to change yourself, it would be best if its not because of me but because you yourself who wants to change. I mean, even if i want to tell my partner 'do this, don't do that' would he do it? How do i know for sure? Does he do it for his own sake, or just to make me stop nagging him?

Ketika gw menerima seseorang untuk menjadi bagian dari hidup gw, gw menerima dia dengan seutuhnya, ga cuma bagusnya, jeleknya juga. Tentu saja teori lebih indah daripada prakteknya tapi gw bener2 berusaha untuk menerima kekurangan pasangan gw. Makanya gw jarang komplen. Gw nyindir. Biar sadar ndiri gitu maksudnya. Gw ga bawel sama hal2 kecil yang ga terlalu prinsip yang penting hidup gw ga terganggu.

Please look at me as being sincere instead of lacking attention.

alone?

2011-04-14T12:42:00.002+07:00

Its fine!

Being alone is fine. Really. I'm being serious here. Maksudnya bukan alone apa-apa, tapi berkaitan dengan tweetnya Sari yang intinya mengatakan kalau kita bisa marah, kesel dan berantem sama ortu kita tapi bayangkan betapa sedihnya kalau kita wisuda, menikah dan melahirkan anak tanpa kehadiran mereka. To which i reply : 'biasa aja tuh #nomention'

Well, as some people would know, cos i share this story with them, my parents didn't show up at my graduation a.k.a wisuda. As they didn't show up at my sister graduation, me and my sister high school graduation, me and my sister middle school and elementary graduation. They didn't make any effort of me trying to go to umptn (its what it called at the time) or even help me with the registration with any of my or my sister school and college.

I took care of everything myself. Me and my sister, we take care of each other. I don't know what would happen in the future but 1 thing i know for sure, if me or my sister ever get married, i'll take care of everything myself and i am the one who will take care of my sister's wedding.

It got nothing to do with love, regret or anything like that. I have always take care of myself and my little sister since i can remember. Now that i earn my own money, i take care of my parents too. Its about being responsible and obligated to be the backbone of the family. Most of the people i know never know how it feels and probably will never know. I don't blame 'em. I'm just sharing what cross my mind when i read that oh-so-naive-tweet. Oh, well.

My First Crush

2011-04-12T17:56:00.000+07:00

Jadi ini ceritanya sebenernya agak lucu karena sejujurnya gw mengakui klo gw ini baru sekali suka sama cowok dan baru terjadi ketika gw berumur 23 tahun... Yah, abisnya namanya tinggal di daerah, vibe-nya jauh beda dari cowok-cowok lokal disini jadi gw jarang ngerasa chemistry yang langsung match dan bikin gw langsung suka sama itu cowok. Gw sih udah pacaran beberapa kali, memang.. Tapi pacaran bukan berarti gw suka ama cowok gw itu kan? Hahah! Jahat banget ya gw?

Klo ga salah inget sih cowok itu umurnya sekitar 5 tahun lebih tua dari gw jadi umurnya waktu itu sekitar 28 tahun. Pertemuan kita berdua itu agak aneh. Ceritanya gw lagi berdiri aja gitu bengong ketika jam pulang kantor, nungguin tebengan ketika tiba-tiba gw didorong-dorong sama temen kantor gw yang kebetulan kita emang deket. Temen kantor gw yang PNS ini adalah lulusan STPDN, dan cowok ini juga lulusan STPDN. Lulusan STPDN itu ikatan alumninya deket banget jadi mereka apal siapa-siapa aja lulusan STPDN yang ada di Kab. Sukabumi dari tiap angkatan. Nah, kebetulan karena temen kantor gw kenal deket jadilah gw didorong-dorong ga jelas. Mungkin maksudnya ngejodohin, tapi kok aneh banget? Tapi ya temen kantor gw ini (cowok) emang agak childish sih, makanya cocok ma gw hahah (dah merit dan punya anak 1 tapi childishnya ga ketulungan).

Nah, pas gw ketemu sama cowok ini gw cuma senyum dikit dan salaman lalu ikut nebeng mobilnya bareng ibu-ibu satu kantor yang juga ikut nebeng (ni cowok ga sekantor ma gw, yaelah klo gw nebeng sendirian padahal baru kenal kan ga mungkin juga). Lucunya, sepanjang jalan gw nebeng ama dia, ni cowok ga pernah sekalipun ngomong atau nengok ke arah gw tapi gw ngerasa ada chemistry sama ni cowok, dan besoknya gw tau klo chemistry ini jalannya mutual. Besoknya gw ketemu dia lagi, kita langsung cocok. He was my first crush. Gw denger dari mulutnya sendiri kalau dia udah punya istri, anak satu dan satu lagi on the way. Istri dan anaknya lagi di bandung karena istrinya ngambil S2. Semakin gw denger ceritanya, semakin gw kenal orangnya, semakin gw ngerasain kejujurannya, jujur, gw malah makin suka. Tapi ya, ga mungkin lah. Hahah! Sejujurnya... gw ditolak. Buhuhuhu! Yaelah, gw gitu loh! Ditolak! Gila ya, pas ditolak rasanya dada gw membuncah sama rasa suka yang malah makin-makin. Dia nolak gw dengan alasan klo dia ga mungkin nyakitin istrinya. Gw suka banget dengan sikap dia yang kek gitu. Itu artinya dia setia sama istrinya dan kesetiaannya itu bener-bener sangat impressive! Semua tentang cowok ini sangat impressive buat gw. Baru kali ini gw ketemu sama cowok yang bener-bener memenuhi semua standar gw dan melampaui itu semua. Sayang gw ketemunya pas dia udah merit.

Gw terinspirasi buat bikin entry ini setelah gw baca tweet ini:

@hitmansystem Ego kamu harus LEBIH besar :) RT @fauzangemblung: @hitmansystem gimana caranya ngatasin wanita yg EGOnya super besar?

Ni cowok... punya ego paling besar yang pernah gw temuin. Pas gw kenal sama dia dikit-dikit, gw terkesan sama egonya yang keknya paling guede sedunia. Dia sombong! He loves to brag... But that's why I like him. He brags but he brags about stuff that he knows that already happen and will happen to his life. He knows what he wants, he knows how to get it, and he knows that he WILL get it.

My first ever crush. I wish I'll meet someone like him again.

Oke, fine...

2011-04-10T17:25:00.001+07:00

Gw tau diri lah.. :))

Well, I'll see you when I see you :D

head turner

2011-04-08T09:11:00.003+07:00

Jadi ceritanya begini... Secara tiba-tiba gw mulai merhatiin penampilan gw lagi. I put more attention on my make up, i started wearing heels again, and what do you know? I am a head turner again.

Head turner is when a girl so stunning, every man would follow her movement with his eyes followed with his head. He'll watch the girl till she's out of his sight.

I'm not being overconfident or making things up. Its the truth! I don't care if people would think i'm a snob or something. Its the truth. Its not all about the make up or sexy clothing to be a head turner, you know? Its not like i'm doing it on purpose. I'm wearing hijab, the purpose of hijab is NOT to be a head turner.

Its all about the attitude.

If you look pretty, you feel pretty, you walk with confidence, other people would look at you and say, 'ah, she's so pretty...,'
If you look pretty but you don't feel pretty and you're not confident with yourself, who would even think you're pretty? Apparently, even yourself doesn't think you're pretty.

Anyway, it feels good to be a head turner once again. It should happen more often. Lol!

Tattoo

2011-04-06T13:58:00.001+07:00

Nadia.

Nama itu tertoreh di kulit lenganku dengan tinta permanen. Semua orang yang melihat tatoku akan merasa heran. Aku memang bukan tipe orang yang terkesan akan mempunyai tato. Wajahku bersih tanpa tindikan, berkacamata, selalu mengenakan kemeja dan celana bahan yang rapi, sering terlihat melakukan percakapan serius dan jauh dari kesan 'normal' seorang yang bertato. Aku sering melihat orang-orang dengan steorotype berandalan, pemabuk, preman, dan sejenisnya. Mereka semua pasti mempunyai tato. Entah sebagai tanda kekuasaan geng mereka, sebagai reminisi dari kesan 'macho berotot, banyak bacot gw bacok' atau mungkin hanya iseng saja sebagai pelengkap style punk mereka dengan berbagai tindikan mulai dari tindikan anting yang melubangi telinga sebesar mur sampai tindikan di lidah.

Komentar-komentar orang beragam tentang tatoku.

"Nadia itu pacarmu, ya?"

"Astaghfirullah! Dulu lo preman ya?"

"Preman tobat, lo?"

"Nadia siapa? Cewek lo?"

"Tatonya ada lagi ga, bang? Tato naga."

"Sakit ga tuh ditato?"

Semua kujawab dengan senyuman acuh.

Aku tidak peduli dengan semua komentar orang dan tatapan sinis yang kuterima dari orang-orang jika tak sengaja lengan kemejaku tersingkap, memperlihatkan nama itu ke semua orang. Aku mencoba sebaik mungkin untuk menyembunyikan tato itu dari pandangan publik meskipun tak ayal kadang tato itu tertangkap oleh pandangan mata orang dan sejuta tanya langsung tersirat dari mereka.

Aku mengelus lengan dimana tatoku berada. Ada yang bertanya, kenapa tatoku itu tidak kuhapus saja? Toh, ada banyak tempat yang menawarkan penghapusan tato permanen menggunakan sinar laser. Agak mahal tapi cukup aman. Lagipula bukannya aku tidak sanggup membayar jasa kosmetik itu. Bukan soal itu. Ini bukan soal itu. Aku menggeleng sambil tersenyum acuh seperti biasa. Orang-orang akan memandangku dengan pandangan bertanya-tanya. Geregetan, mungkin.

Karena tidak pernah mendengar jawaban yang jelas dari mulutku, gosip pun merebak. Kebetulan aku kuliah dimana nama Nadia adalah sebuah nama yang cukup umum. Salah satu dari gadis-gadis yang bernama Nadia itu adalah seorang primadona kampus. Banyak rumor berkembang tentang aku yang sengaja mentato tanganku dengan namanya karena terobsesi dan jatuh cinta setengah mati padanya. Bahkan rumor itu berkembang seakan-akan aku adalah stalker (penguntit.red) Nadia. Aku tidak bisa mengatakan apa-apa jadi aku hanya bisa menggelengkan kepalaku heran. Berita tentang tatoku tersebar pesat. Semua orang menatapku dengan tatapan aneh. Mereka sengaja melirik ke arah lenganku dan berusaha mengintip menembus kain pakaianku untuk melihat tato bertuliskan 'Nadia' disitu.

Suatu hari gadis bernama Nadia itu tiba-tiba muncul didepanku. Aku tergagap. Dia cantik, sangat cantik. Pantas menjadi primadona kampus. Aku terpana melihatnya. Gadis itu memandangiku dari ujung rambut sampai ujung kaki dengan pandangan heran. Mungkin ia merasa heran kenapa cowok culun sepertiku berani-beraninya jatuh cinta padanya dan mempunyai tato bertuliskan namanya. Ia berjalan mendekatiku.

"Kamu yang namanya Farid?"

"Iya,"

"Mana tatonya? Ada nama gw kan disitu?"

"Eh? Lebih baik ga usah dilihat,"

"Lo mau gw tuntut dengan tuduhan stalker, he?"

Aku diam, menggelengkan kepala lalu melangkah pergi. Nadia meraih tanganku, mencegahku untuk berjalan menghindar. Ia terlihat penasaran. Tangannya meraba lengan kemejaku, berusaha mengungkap tato misteri itu. Aku bergerak maju. Tatapanku mendadak terlihat tegas dan galak. Tanganku yang mencegah tangan Nadia untuk menguak lengan kemejaku pasti terasa kuat dan kasar bagi gadis kurus itu. Aku menyentak tangannya sambil tetap menatapnya. Ia terlihat kaget. Aku geram. Tanpa melihat ke belakang aku pun melangkah pergi. Nadia sepertinya terlalu kaget untuk mencoba mencegahku untuk melangkah pergi tapi aku tidak peduli.

Beberapa hari berlalu tanpa insiden berarti. Orang-orang sudah tidak terlalu penasaran dengan tatoku dan mereka hanya mengacuhkanku seperti biasa. Aku menjalani hari-hariku tanpa beban... seperti biasa. Sampai suatu hari yang tampaknya akan mulai dengan biasa, tapi ternyata menjadi diluar kebiasaan, seorang Nadia berdiri di depan pintu kostku. Ia mengangguk dan tersenyum ramah. Aku agak terkejut tapi membalasnya dengan kesantunan yang sama. Ia mengajakku untuk berjalan bersama ke kampus dan aku menyetujui dengan agak canggung. Orang-orang memperhatikan kami yang jalan beriringan. Beberapa memberikan pandangan sinis, terutama para penggemar Nadia yang diam-diam maupun yang terang-terangan. Nadia terlihat tidak keberatan berjalan berdampingan denganku dan kami membahas tentang beberapa dosen dan mata kuliah yang kebetulan sama. Ternyata Nadia seorang perempuan biasa saja (meskipun menurutku kecantikannya cukup luar biasa). Aku merasa nyaman ketika selesai kuliah Nadia mengajakku untuk pulang bersama.

Rutinitas kami berlangsung selama beberapa hari. Nadia beberapa kali menanyakan tentang tatoku secara selewat tapi aku tidak pernah menjawabnya. Aku tahu Nadia berusaha mendekatiku karena dia penasaran dengan tato yang ada di tanganku tapi aku tidak pernah menjawab pertanyaan itu dan sepertinya ia malah tidak pernah lepas dari sisiku karena semakin penasaran dengan tatoku. Aku membiarkan saja Nadia berada disisiku, menjalani rutinitas yang sama setiap hari. Hari menjadi minggu, minggu menjadi bulan dan bulan menjadi tahun. Nadia tetap berada disisiku. Meskipun ia sempat berpacaran dengan laki-laki lain tapi dia selalu kembali kesisiku.

Diam-diam, gantian aku yang menjadi penasaran. Kenapa Nadia tetap berada disisiku? Selama tahun-tahun kami bersama, tidak mungkin tidak kami menumbuhkan sebuah perasaan tertentu. Tapi anehnya, meskipun kami sudah lama bersama, Nadia tetap bertanya tentang tatoku. Ia masih penasaran. Aku pun penasaran.

Apakah Nadia tetap bersamaku karena dia masih belum mendengar cerita tentang tatoku, tentang satu-satunya bagian dari hidupku yang belum diketahui gadis yang kini menjadi sahabat tak terpisahkanku itu? Atau karena dia merasa nyaman bersamaku? Aku penasaran, apakah setelah ia tahu rahasia dibalik tatoku itu ia akan pergi meninggalkanku karena merasa bahwa ia sudah mengenalku luar dalam dan tidak lagi merasa ada misteri yang perlu dikuak? Aku penasaran karena dia masih penasaran.

Suatu hari yang sejuk, aku dan Nadia sedang duduk bersama di salah satu kafe langganan kami. Salah satu rutinitas kami di hari minggu, menghabiskan sore hari di kafe itu, saling mengobrol dan bertukar cerita.

"Nad, kamu masih penasaran dengan tatoku?"

"Masih,"

"Kenapa?"

"Karena kamu tidak pernah memberitahu apa arti tatomu itu,"

"Kalau aku tidak pernah cerita?"

"Ya, aku masih akan terus penasaran,"

"Kalau aku cerita?"

Dia terdiam lama.

"Aku belum pernah memikirkan hal itu. Ya, mungkin hidup akan berjalan seperti biasa,"

Gantian aku yang terdiam lama.

Aku tersenyum lalu mengganti topik pembicaraan.

Waktu berlalu. Kami tumbuh bersama dan menjadi tak terpisahkan. Nadia menjadi istriku. Jika aku melihat ke belakang, aku merasa bahwa semua ini cukup lucu. Bagaimana mungkin seorang yang culun seperti aku dulu bisa mempunyai seorang sahabat, kekasih dan kini istri seperti seorang Nadia? Seperti mimpi. Semua ini jalinan takdir. Takdir yang terurai dari sebuah tato bertuliskan sebuah nama. Tato itu terus menempel di lenganku sampai aku menjadi tua dan keriput. Nadia tentu saja sempat bertanya-tanya pada semua relasi dan keluarga terdekatku tentang asal muasal tatoku tapi mereka semua menjawab hal yang sama; mereka tidak tahu. Aku tahu Nadia masih penasaran, kadang aku merasa dia agak cemburu karena takut nama Nadia itu adalah mantan pacarku yang mempunyai nama yang sama seperti dirinya. Aku hanya tersenyum acuh. Seperti biasa.

Kini aku telah tiada, meninggalkan seorang istri yang cantik, anak-anak yang menawan dan cucu-cucu yang luar biasa. Ketika aku merasa waktuku sudah dekat, aku meninggalkan sepucuk surat untuk istriku. Aku memberitahunya, dengan nafas berat terakhirku, bahwa dalam surat itu aku menjelaskan darimana asal usul tatoku. Nadia menangis. Aku pun ikut menangis. Kami berdua menangis ketika jiwaku meninggalkan ragaku. Aku bisa merasakan bahwa Nadia mencintaiku selama tahun-tahun kami bersama, tulus tanpa beban. Tapi aku penasaran. Aku penasaran apakah dia masih penasaran. Aku masih bisa melihat, mendengar dan merasa sebelum jiwaku melanjutkan perjalanannya ke arah yang semestinya. Aku melihat Nadia mengelus surat yang kuberikan kepadanya. Aku bisa mendengar dia menangisi surat terakhir yang kuberikan kepadanya. Aku merasakan getaran kebimbangan pada surat yang kutinggalkan untuknya.

Surat itu ikut dikubur denganku. Masih tersegel. Belum pernah dibuka meskipun dengan jejak-jejak airmata di permukaannya yang putih mulus. Rahasia itu ikut terkubur bersamaku. Rahasia sebuah tato bernama Nadia. Ternyata Nadia sudah tidak lagi penasaran. Aku lega karena aku pun tidak lagi penasaran. Nadia mencintaiku karena aku, bukan karena dia penasaran.

2011-04-04T11:08:00.000+07:00

Kesadaranku telah kembali. Aku kembali dari peraduanku. Mimpiku samar-samar teringat untuk kemudian terlupakan dalam hitungan menit. Aku masih memejamkan mata, terlalu malas untuk melihat dunia. Aku mencoba mengingat-ingat apa yang kulakukan semalam, siapa yang terakhir kulihat, apa yang terakhir kumakan dan kuminum. Entah kenapa aku hanya mengingat secara samar-samar. Aku mencoba mengingat jam berapa aku tidur, menghitung berapa jam aku tertidur dan menyesali betapa sedikitnya waktu yang kupakai untuk mengistirahatkan mata yang perih serta badan yang letih.

Lupa.

Kenapa aku lupa?

Masih dalam posisi terlentang dan memejamkan mata, aku mengerutkan kening. Aku berusaha mengingat-ingat semua yang terlupa. Aku berusaha mengenang kenangan terakhirku. Kenangan terakhirku adalah saat aku sarapan di rumah, bertengkar dengan ibuku yang cerewet tentang sepatu apa yang akan kupakai, melengos ketika ayahku menyuruhku untuk berhati-hati di jalan dan mereject telepon dari adikku yang menyebalkan. Aku terlalu sibuk dengan tugas kuliah. Semua isi pikiranku hanya berkutat seputar tugas yang diberikan dosen statistik super galak bernama Bu Ratna. Si ibu itu selalu saja memberikan tugas-tugas yang nyaris mustahil bagiku untuk diselesaikan sendirian. Memikirkannya lagi saja sudah membuatku berkeringat dingin.

Aku mengingat-ingat teman-temanku. Aku bisa melihat mereka tapi anehnya hanya badannya saja lengkap dengan pakaian khas anak kuliah dan tas ransel butut, tapi wajahnya tak terlihat. Kepala mereka dimana wajah dan rambut mereka seharusnya terlihat jelas, di bayanganku wajahnya hanya terlihat buram dan tidak jelas. Seperti ada yang menghapus wajah mereka dengan kuas blur di photoshop. Sekali lagi aku mengerutkan kening, berusaha mengingat wajah mereka. Gagal. Aku masih memejamkan mata. Untukku jauh lebih gampang jika aku mencoba mengingat sambil memejamkan mata daripada sebaliknya. Jika matanya terbuka, aku biasanya jadi gampang terdistraksi. Jika aku membuka mataku sekarang dan malah melihat jam, aku akan teringat dengan tugas-tugas kuliahku yang belum dikerjakan karena selalu kutunda-tunda. Jika aku membuka mataku dan melihat isi lemari, aku akan teringat bahwa aku harus berbelanja karena baju-bajuku sudah sangat ketinggalan jaman dan aku harus membeli sepatu lucu merk Gosh yang kulihat di mall kemarin. Jika aku membuka mataku dan melihat wajah ibuku, aku jadi ada keinginan untuk berteriak dan berontak, menentang setiap kata yang keluar dari mulut ibu lalu menghabiskan waktu dengan bertengkar. Kalau itu semua terjadi, bagaimana aku bisa fokus mengingat-ingat wajah teman-temanku?

Oh! Aku teringat sesuatu... Aku dan teman-temanku kan suka saling berfoto-foto di hpku. Seperti teman-temanku yang lain aku juga suka main facebook. Rasanya tidak lengkap kalau tidak minimal sehari aku dan teman-temanku saling mengambil foto kami yang sedang iseng dan diupload ke situs pertemanan itu. Aku malah punya beberapa teman yang lebih dekat ketika kami chat di facebook daripada ketika bertemu langsung. Ah, betapa bodohnya diriku. Hal yang se-simple ini saja sampai harus diributkan segala (meskipun hanya dalam kepalaku saja, sih).

Tanganku bergerak. Meraih-raih ke tempat aku biasa menaruh hp. Di samping bantal. Agar aku bisa mendengar siapapun yang sms dan telpon. Aku harus selalu terhubung dengan dunia. Paling tidak begitu pikirku, dan diamini oleh teman-temanku. Indera perasaku di ujung-ujung jari menemukan keanehan. Kasurku tidak terasa. Bantalku tidak terasa. Apalagi hpku. Anehnya punggungku tidak terasa pegal meskipun berdasarkan indera perasaku, aku merasa seperti sedang tidur di permukaan yang datar dan rata. Aku berpikir (masih dengan mata yang terpejam) bahwa mungkin aku sedang tertidur di lantai saking capeknya. Lantainya tidak terasa dingin, badannya tidak terasa kaku. Aku merasa aneh.

Aku berpikir, berpikir dan terus berpikir. Ini hari apa? Senin? Aku sudah tertidur selama berapa lama? Ini sudah jam berapa? Aku harus buru-buru. Telat ke kampus nanti. Banyak yang harus kukerjakan hari ini. Perlahan, aku membuka mata. Aku memerjapkan mata beberapa kali. Kok masih gelap? Ini masih malam? Aku sebenarnya kapan tidurnya? Selama berapa lama?

Akhirnya aku menggerakkan tubuhku. Aku berusaha bangun. Masih gelap. Aku berusaha meraba-raba. Mencari-cari saklar lampu. Aku berjalan dengan langkah bayi, berusaha mencari saklar lampu tanpa tersandung meja atau terhantam kasur. Kamarku sempit. Lama-lama aku terheran-heran. Aku sudah berjalan dan berjalan tapi masih belum menemukan saklar lampu. Aku ini sedang berada di kamar atau di tempat lain? Kalau ini benar kamarku, harusnya aku sudah menghantam tembok dari sejak 5 menit yang lalu.

Aku mulai panik. Ini terlalu gelap, terlalu kosong, terlalu sunyi. Aku hanya bisa mendengar suara nafasku sendiri yang lama-lama mulai memburu. Aku berusaha menenangkan diri. Mungkin aku diculik dan dikurung di suatu gudang. Pikiranku penuh dengan teori konspirasi mulai dari yang paling memungkinkan sampai yang paling absurd. Aku menghabiskan waktu entah berapa lama hanya untuk memikirkan teori-teori labil itu. Perlahan, air mata mulai mengalir. Aku mulai terisak-isak. Aku kangen iPodku. Disini terlalu sunyi. Aku kangen TV dan DVD playerku. Disini terlalu kosong. Aku kangen komputerku dan internetku. Disini aku sendirian. Aku kangen lampu kamarku. Disini terlalu gelap.

Isakanku mengeras. Aku terus menerus menangis sampai mataku terasa perih dan badanku lemas. Aku takut. Sumpah, aku takut. Aku ingin berbicara. Aku harus berbicara. Rasanya aku mau jadi gila!

"Ge-gelap... Aku ingin terang,"

Seketika itu juga aku melihat cahaya berpendar dari ujung sana. Satu persatu lampu neon ukuran besar berwarna putih menyala di langit-langit yang tinggi, menerangi ruangan dimana aku disekap. Aku terheran-heran melihat apa yang sedang kulihat saat ini. Ini begitu absurd! Jutaan lampu neon menyala, menerangi sebuah ruangan tak berujung berwarna putih. Putih. Putih yang begitu sempurna. Seperti film Matrix! Bukan broken white, bukan krem, bukan putih kusam, tapi warna putih yang benar-benar putih. Menyilaukan.

Penerangan itu menjawab kenapa aku tidak menabrak tembok sedari tadi. Memang tidak ada tembok. Tidak ada pembatas, yang ada hanyalah lantai berwarna putih dan langit-langit yang terang benderang dengan neon, tanpa tembok, tanpa pembatas. Tuhan. Apa-apaan ini?! Dan yang paling aneh, aku baru saja menyebut kata 'Tuhan'. Sudah lama aku lupa dengan kata itu. Aku sudah lupa kenapa aku sampai lupa dengan Tuhan. Saking lamanya! Tapi saat melihat keabsurd-an yang paling absurd dari semua keabsurd-an yang pernah kulihat, tanpa sadar aku memikirkan 'Tuhan'. Tidak ada kata lain yang bisa menggambarkan apa yang sedang dilihatnya selain kata 'Tuhan'....

Aku berseru. Memanggil ibu, ayah, adikku, pamanku, bibiku, pembantuku, tetangga sebelah, semua satu persatu nama teman-temanku, siapapun yang bisa teringat olehku. Aku hanya bisa mendengar suaraku sendiri. Suaraku bahkan tidak bergema. Berarti ruangan ini memang tidak ada batasnya. Aku berusaha berfikir rasional. Kalau aku berjalan cukup jauh, berarti aku pasti bisa menemukan ujungnya. Aku bisa mencari cara untuk kabur asal aku bisa menemukan sebuah dinding. Baiklah, aku pasti bisa.

Lalu aku mulai berjalan mencari dinding. Aku berjalan selama entah berapa lama, tapi yang jelas aku berjalan sampai kakiku terasa pegal. Mataku nanar menatap warna putih tak berujung. Tak sepotongpun warna lain selain warna kulitku. Bahkan pakaianku pun berwarna putih. Sebuah kaus dan celana kain berwarna putih. Nyaman tapi freaky. Aku yakin aku tidak punya kaos dan celana panjang kain berwarna putih ini. Aku beristirahat setiap kali aku merasa lelah. Tak sekalipun aku merasa haus dan lapar tapi aku belum merasa aneh. Aku tertidur tanpa sadar setiap kali aku merasa terlalu letih dan setiap kali aku membuka mata, aku berdoa agar aku terbangun di kamarku, mendengar suara ibuku yang akan terdengar seperti nyanyian surga saat ini, sentuhan kehangatan matahari yang akan terlihat seperti cahaya surga setelah beberapa waktu di tempat ini. Aku tidak lagi kangen TV, DVD, komputer, hp, iPod dan semua barang elektronik itu. Aku kangen warna. Aku kangen warna hijau tanaman, aku kangen warna orange matahari, aku kangen warna coklat kayu, aku kangen warna biru dinding kamarku. Aku kangen suara. Aku kangen suara ibuku yang cempreng dan tak ada habisnya, suara ayah yang jarang terdengar tapi sangat berat dan berwibawa, suara adikku yang bagaikan duplikat suara ibuku. Aku bahkan kangen suara kokokan ayam jantan di ujung jalan serta suara gonggongan anjing yang membuatnya tak bisa tidur setiap malam. Aku kangen suara adzan di mesjid setiap beberapa jam. Aku kangen....

Aku menangis. Menangis dan menangis...

Tuhan.

Aku telah mati? Aku mati? Tapi kenapa aku dibiarkan sendirian seperti ini? Apakah aku sangat berdosa? Aku kangen keluargaku, Tuhan. Aku kangen hidup! Tuhan, seandainya pun aku telah mati, jangan kau hiraukan aku seperti ini. Hukum aku, lihatlah aku. Aku tidak ingin sendiri.

Tuhan, jangan kau palingkan dirimu dariku. Maafkan aku telah memalingkan diri darimu dan semua orang disekitarku. Maaf ibu, maaf ayah, maaf adek, maaf.... Tuhan.

"Dek. Adek! Bangun! Kamu kenapa? Mimpi buruk ya? Nangisnya kenceng banget... Udah, gak apa-apa," Suara ibu terdengar menenangkan. Nyaman. Aku bermimpi? Mataku masih terpejam. Air mata masih mengalir di pipiku dan dari sela-sela mataku, tapi aku sudah tidak lagi terisak-isak. Suara ibu terdengar bagaikan denting surga.

Aku membuka mata. Aku melihat wajah ibu. Aku menangis lagi.

Aku pulang.

sms indosat

2011-04-02T16:19:00.001+07:00

Kmu harus hubungi *465*2# dr HP kmu SEKARANG JUGA,krn segera dipilih kandidat utk JLN2 KE INGGRIS ketemu dgn pemain2 CHELSEA FC, GRATIS+uang saku total Rp1,4M!

Yea, right..

the way it is

2011-04-01T10:00:00.002+07:00

So i was blogwalking to @leonisecret blog at www.leonisecret.com where on her latest post, she talk about overcoming the difficulties of life, to ignore the bullies and reinvent urself so u can conquer the world and be more confident, menggunakan sesuatu yang kita takuti atau kita anggap sebagai kelemahan dan diubah menjadi kelebihan kita. Its really an inspiring and a well written piece.

Speaking about bullies, it actually remind me of my childhood. Dari dulu gw selalu jadi anak pendiam kesayangan guru. I would always sit in a corner and read something. I was a nerd and i was even wearing a nerd glasses (it wasn't really a trendy thing back then). But i wasn't born that way. I used to be that cheerful popular kid at my first elementary school, but then i transfer school and get depressed cos i just realized that i don't adapt to new environment very well (till this day). Not to mention i got bully at this new school... Makes it even more unbearable. I really don't want to share why i got bullied cos... Damnit its so stupid!

I promise myself that i'll start a new me when i got to middle school. And it went well, actually. I got good grades and active with school organizations. I was a bit stressed out cos i was an alien in elementary school and suddenly i have so many things that i have to do and none of it feels familiar. Thank god i found some friends at middle school.

But than... I have to switch school... Again.

Being an outcast... Again.

Have i told u that i don't adapt well with new environment?

I went to high school with a fresh start, it felt like middle school again. I got good grades and was active at school organization. I didn't switch to another school so i was safe all the way through high school. All the people at my school were very nice, but there was one event that i still remember till this day. It was when telenovela was a big hit, and Betty La Fea was one popular telenovela. It was when an exam where we sit on seperate tables and someone wrote 'Betty La Fea' on my desk. A big joke.

Fyi, i never feel that i'm ugly. I was insecure with myself, yes. But i always know that i'm not ugly. I wasn't mad cos someone wrote 'Betty La Fea' on my desk cos on the telenovela itself, Betty wasn't ugly, she was just untakencare (tidak terurus.red) of. Cos she was poor, she can't afford those fancy clothes and make up the other girls are wearing. She's not ugly, she's just poor.

The story of mylife. I'm not ugly, i'm just poor. I hate bullies cos they just don't get it. They thought that i choose to wear my outfit and glasses that way. Well, don't they know that i do want to wear new freshly made uniforms, not the leftovers from my older sister (who is shorter than me), i do want to wear a nice glasses, not the one which i wore from elementary school cos i'm too poor to buy a new one, i do want to buy new shoes, socks, bags, EVERYTHING, but i CAN'T because i'm THAT poor.

Now, i make my own money. I didn't regret my past cos i am who i am because of my past.

i prefer..

2011-03-30T23:04:00.001+07:00

I prefer texts like:
"Get something to eat. Its lunch time. :*"
Rather than:
"Dah makan siang? Jangan telat makan ya, tar sakit."

Or...

"Sweet dream! I'll meet u there.."
Rather than:
"Dah tidur? Met istirahat ya. :-)"

And..

"Don't miss praying, I wanna see u in heaven. :-)"
Rather than (and i totally hate it):
"Udah sholat?"

Jangan cek2 gw, gw berterimakasih atas perhatian kalian semua tapi kalian belum jadi pacar saya, weeek! :P

Bye-bye March...

2011-03-30T20:42:00.000+07:00

So I'm living my life, not online, but my real life. Its fun, really, watching people, seeing how they act, what they think, how they live their life. I found it really refreshing.

So, that's something new. Anyway, I'm no longer broke but I'm still not fully recovered. Hopefully next month things would start to looking out for me. I'm still hoping for a better future but I can't say that I'm not enjoying this moment.

Safir Senduk tweets : Galau biasanya berbanding lurus dengan kondisi keuangan.

I can't say that's not true. Its perfect to describe how I am right now. I'm not depressed anymore. I have money in my pocket! Yeay! Lets celebrate by watching youtube for 3 hours! Ooohh yeaaahhh~~

April, here I come!

Miss W (Whiner)

2011-03-24T17:09:00.001+07:00

Hey, let me share you guys about what happen with me today.

I cried.

Not once, twice.

Keren ya? :D

Jadi ceritanya gw sedang merefleksi diri (mengasihani diri.red) dan gw menemukan bahwa hidup gw sangatlah menyedihkan (saat ini). Dalam keadaan super bokek, tekanan kanan kiri, suasana kantor yang ga mendukung, no one to talk to (ya sebenernya gw bersyukur Cubung sms pas gw emang pengen curhat, turns out, its his birthday today! Congratz, man!) dan keluarga yang menurut gw kurang suportif juga bikin nambah tekanan di pundak gw yang udah berat penuh beban.

And so, I let all my pressure and stress out with the only way I know how, crying. If I hold a cigarette in my hand at that time, I'll smoke my stress out. But I didn't have one and too broke to buy one. Feels so miserable and really need someone to talk to (at 1 AM). When I cried the second time, it was noon and I cried in the toilet. A romantic place to cry. Really, I was really stressed out. All those burden are in my shoulder and I have no one to share my burden with.

I'm fine right now. I had a few laughs and I'm meeting a friend from work and hoping to get a few laughs as well. Its funny sometimes I think the people who are the furthest away from me are usually the closest friend I got.

Hey World

2011-03-23T14:20:00.000+07:00

Hey, I've been MIA for a few days but not a few month yet so no worries!

Lagi males nulis Day-Day-an dan berhubung lagi menghitung mundur menit2 sampe waktunya pulang ~~sekolah~~ kantor jadi sekarang ngeblog dulu.

Ngomongin apa ya? Hmm.. Akhir-akhir ini gw terobsesi sama 2 hal, yang satu ga usah dibahas karena saking obviousnya, yang satu lagi itu Miss Ussy. Gila ya gw baca blog entrynya yang terbaru setelah kosong BERTAHUN-TAHUN *lebai* bikin gw geregetan! Gw makin penasaran aja sama eneng yang satu ini. Maksud gw, kok ada ya orang yang kek dia ini? Pengen belek otaknya dan liat apa aja sih isinya? :))

Yah, gw dah ada rencana buat main ke Malang dan ketemuan sama si eneng yang satu ini di bulan Juli, mudah2an jadi and I really can't wait! >.<
Katanya Cubung sih perjalanan sejauh itu ke Malang buat ketemu sama Miss Ussy ini sangat worth it, so I'm really getting more and more curious! :p

Another update, Money is still far away, out of sight. I'm sure it will come... eventually. I shouldn't worry about it too much and promise to myself that I'll try and be diligent to save some of my money for crisis times like this.

Today's blessing : DPA hampir selesai dan gw bisa lunch sambil ngobrol panjang lebar sama teh Cicik. :)

Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

2011-03-17T14:44:00.000+07:00

Oh, this is too much! My ex-boyfriend?

Umm, I have quite a few ex-bf and they're all nice and all, but the fact that I'm single only mean 1 thing, I'm not that into them. Any of them. Its my fault and I take the resposibility fully.

I had a great time with them and I hope they had a great time with me too. I can't hope too high about their feelings about me cos I always make some kind of wall between me and them. I can't get too close with them for some reason and I feel bad about it.

Well, there's not much to say about this...

Day 6 — A stranger

2011-03-16T12:23:00.001+07:00

I don't really get what this means... A stranger?

I met with a lot of strangers in my life. I met them via internet. I have a lot of strangers listed as my 'friends' on facebook *proud* #apeu.

I met a lot of strangers from daredarou, my first online community forum. I like the people that I met there. They're all so nice and welcoming to me. I go to a lot of Japanese events in Jakarta, get to know how to get around cos of it and I know more about Japanese culture than I need or wanted to know. Lol. Well, the most precious things I got from surfing the net is, I get to talk with peculiar and unusual people. Interesting people. And if I'm lucky, I get to meet them in person and chat even more.

Its funny that in person, I'm very protective about this whole stranger thing. It feels more safe and nice to talk to strangers at a chat room or a community forum on the internet, rather than actually meeting with strangers. I don't really talk to strangers, especially those who I meet on the bus, or train. My friend, Cubs, like to talk to strangers he met on trains or bus but than again, he's a guy. I'm a girl. I can't talk to strangers, what if the person I talk to is a con artist and they drug me and took all my money, or worst, kidnap me and... eww just imagining it make me feel chill on my spine.

My parents always make sure when I was a kid that I don't talk to strangers. Maybe that's why I don't even know who live right next door *gubrak*.

But I learn that not all strangers are bad, if you get to know them, these strangers can be a friend. A dear friend. Or my be a soulmate? Who knows?

Before we becomes friends, couples, aren't we all just strangers to each others?

Day 5 — Your dreams

2011-03-14T12:51:00.001+07:00

Now here's the hard part... I'm proud to say that I have no dream. Wait, that sounds so pathetic...

The truth is, I had a vague image of someone to become when I was little. I wanna be just like my mom. She work at the prestigious Sudirman Street, wearing fancy professional outfits, working in an aircon room with foreigner as her boss. I thought it was so cool, all of the above. That's why I wanna be just like my mom, a carrier woman, a business woman, a young professional. That's so cool in my head that I even started reading 'Femina' magazine since very young (well, my mom subscribe to it, so yeah I read it).

Now that I think about it, my dream is so plain. LOL! And if you look at it from a certain angle, I got my dream already. I'm now working as a PNS, a carrier woman, just like I always wanted. So now that I achieve my dream, the normal thing to do, I should get a new dream, right?

The problem with that is, I don't have any dreams. I mean, I just live life day by day with this so epicly boring feeling in my heart. I also wanted to abroad, traveling around the world (alone or with friends) and I'm achieving that too, little by little. I went to Singapore last year and I'm planning to go to China next year, both with dear friends. So that dream is coming true too, and now, I need another long term dream. My short term dream right now is to have a cool android smart phone so I can chat, blog and browsing with ease. I prefer netting by phone for some reason...

Oh! I do want to move to a better place than where I live right now, and I still want a fine library on my house someday even though I don't read that much anymore (I still need a place for my books, tho). So, that's my dream... for now.

I wanna have a sweet dream, a very sweet dream. I will. Someday.

Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)

2011-03-10T13:50:00.001+07:00

Day 4! Yeay! Berhubung internet kantor gw tumben jalan, jadi gw memutuskan untuk blogwalking lalu keingetan sama blog gw sendiri yang udah bersarang laba-laba. :D So here I am, blogging. Wasting my time since I have some spare time after NOT being a BP at my office anymore (YEAY!).

So day 4 is about my sibling... I have 2 sibling but I feel like I only have 1. My little sister, Natasha Mirza Putri.

So yeah, she's all I got. I grew up with her and she's a little spoiled brat if you ask me. Its my fault for spoiling her in the first place, anyway... so, I got no one to blame. She's stronger than me and she's really mature in her own way. I learn how to be confident because of her. When I was still a teenager, I don't have any confident what so ever, and my sister.. well, she's just the way she is now: super confident! So I learn to except myself and to say to myself: hey, you're pretty, you're smart, you deserve more than what you have now! And so I did and this is how I become. I've come a long way since my teens.

My older sister name is Ayu Miranti. She's 2 years older than me, and my little sister is 2 years younger than me. We grew up in separate places so we're not really that close. But you can always see that we're related, seeing that if would be standing together, you could tell that we look so much alike.

Well... that's my sibling. Love 'em! :D

Day 3— Your parents

2011-03-08T17:58:00.003+07:00

My parents are... hmmm.. how do you say this?

My beginning?

There's a beginning and there's an end. My story of life started with my parents. They're the first people I met (except for the doctors who help delivered me) and the first people who love me.

I can assure you that I don't have a normal, happy childhood like what the civil standard of a normal, happy childhood, but I survive, my sister also survive and I think the main reason we both survive is because my parents keep being together. They don't split up and left us in a relatives house, living a gloom life. No, they hang on and stay together, keeping the family intact. Sometimes I just can't stand it and wish they'd just split up already and move on... But for some reason, they still hang in there, through everything and all...for their children: me and my sister.

I thank them for their judgment to keep the family together cos it made me stronger. I thank them for keeping me by their side even though I know they can't afford it cos it made me feel that I have to take care of them as they did to me. I thank them for putting my education first, which made me smarter than my other snob rich relatives. I thank them for their trust on me, it made me the independent woman I am today.

I'm sorry I'm not married yet and haven't give you the grandchild you want, mom, dad. But I am who I am today cos of you. So I thank you. :)

Day 2 — Your Crush

2011-03-04T12:59:00.001+07:00

Ini bukan Day 2 tapi yaudahlah ya... skip2 aja.. hahah maklum arteiss! Sibuk euy! Sibuk dikejar2 bos suruh bikin anggaran! Nasib bener jadi satu2nya di kantor yang bisa make komputer lancar.. -__-

Anyway, Day 2 is about my crush.. Maksudnya current crush nih? Gw ga ada klo current crush. Ga punya kecengan/gebetan/apaanlah itu istilahnya jaman sekarang... Intinya mah gw jomblo tanpa ada calon pacar berkualitas di dekat gw. Klo pun ada biasanya mereka ga available alias taken. Takennya ga nanggung2, yang deketin gw pasti dah pada married semua, yang gw suka pas dah married semua, gw sampe ngomongin itu sama temen kantor gw klo misalnya cowok itu setelah married, malah makin charming! I don't know why but they just are!

Right now, I have no crush... but I'm hoping to find one real soon! Its boring to be single and living in a separate city from your friends. I have no one to talk to during the weekend and its sooooo boring!

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

2011-03-01T19:07:00.000+07:00

I don't have a lot of best friend. Probably cos I can't really be a best friend from the first place. I don't really like to spend my time with people who I have no interest with, I don't really listen to stories that is not engage my interest, I don't really change when people around me change. The other day, I met my high school friend and she's married with a child. I think its great for her, but on the other hand, I'm not married, I don't have kids, I don't work at the same office as her, thus, I'm not really interested in keeping in touch with her (though, I got her facebook address--of course). I'm not jealous, FYI. I feel happy for her. We just don't have a lot in common whether as adults or back then when we were still in our teens.

Speaking of best friends, I have a couple of best friends. Just a few but I'm so lucky to find them and call them my best friend. I think I'll stay in touch with them even if they got married with kids and I'm still single. I think they'll still be as cool even if we don't live in the same background anymore.

Natasha Mirza Putri, Nayuningtias, Yunita Kurniati, Mida Nopitasari, Septi Handayani

They're so cool and have the same 'vibe' with me. Even though we don't always share the same opinions about things, we have the same perspective of things that make us have more thing in common than our differences.

Another people who I consider my best friend is Lian, Cubung, dan Sigi.

I don't know if they consider me as one of their best friend, but I certainly am. Like what I always said, it doesn't matter what you think, its what I think that matters. I consider them as one of my best friends but its okay if they don't consider me as one of theirs. Its fine. My feelings is all that matter. They're so nice to me anyway. :)

Anyway, to oknum C, I know you're going to rough path right now. Maybe you feel like you're going back to square zero at this point in your life. There's nothing I can do about it, I can't even text you to show my support cos apparently my text isn't delivered, but I hope you read this and know that as time goes by, as you get more time to think, to settle your emotions, I am here to be your friend and watch you as you go and be an adult. :) My last message: don't die young!

Anyway, end of day 1! See you on day 2. :D

challenge

2011-03-01T18:52:00.000+07:00

So i went blogwalking the other day and i found this amusing blog that belong to @missviona whom i follow on twitter and i really admire her for her words. She have the most amazing words (and brain if I may add). There's a challenge there and I'd like to make it myself. She took the challenge from @ijotoska blog (which is as amazing as Viona's blog).

The challenge is :

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3— Your parents
Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

So... This would be fun! :D

amazed

2011-02-27T00:08:00.003+07:00

i'm amazed seeing people who is about my age but they're so different! Its not a bad thing, they're just being themselves, i just can't connect with them and eventually just looking at them with an awe look on my eyes.

I'm like, 'wow! How could she/he be like that?! Thats just.... So not me!'

well? I bet people do think like that sometimes when u meet people who is the exact opposite of who u are. If not? Well i just that just me hahah..

I wonder...

2011-02-25T19:06:00.000+07:00

What does people think about if they see me, wearing a hijab, buying Mix Max at Alfamart?

What does the girl is thinking, sipping wine and still wearing her hijab?

What is the girl with hijab thinking while smoking her light cigarette, while on the next table a girl with shorts and tank top is doing the same thing as her?

Would you judge? Of course you would.

saya bukan pemeran pembantu!

2011-02-18T13:52:00.004+07:00

semua orang pengen perhatian, butuh diperhatiin. Emangnya gw invisible woman, apa? Gw ga minta atau ngemis2 supaya diperhatiin. I know how it works. Gw yang pertama mendekati kok, gw yang biasanya pertama menyapa, gw yang biasanya nanya2 mulai dari kabar sampe yang aneh2, gw ngasih perhatian ama lo karna menurut gw lo menarik dan menyenangkan.

Trus? Lo ga bakalan pernah nyapa gw duluan? Lo ga bakalan pernah nanya kabar gw atau apapun tentang gw? Lo ga nganggep gw cukup menarik dan menyenangkan?

Gw males dong kalo harus terus2an jadi tong sampah lo. Gw mungkin awalnya super tertarik ama cerita2 lo tapi makin kesini gw ilfil dong kalo lo bahkan ga mau tau cerita2 tentang gw. Gw ga pernah ngejudge lo macem2, males dong gw kalo gw harus berubah sifat/karakter ke apa yang dalam pandangan lo 'baik dan benar'. Apakah menurut lo salah klo gw minta jumlah perhatian yang sama dengan apa yang gw kasih ke elo?

Gw bukan pemeran pembantu yang tugasnya cuma untuk membuat cerita pemeran utamanya bersinar! Gw juga pemeran utama, kali! At least in my life.

2011-02-18T13:52:00.001+07:00

As much as i'm happy

2011-02-08T06:52:00.002+07:00

...to see my friends happy, i'll feel a lot happier if they share their lovey dovey at some place private. I, personally, am a private person, thus, i don't like being intimate with my love one on public.

bulukan

2011-02-04T13:10:00.000+07:00

Blog saya udah bulukan. Kasian deh saya. Liat aja ini bedanya antara Maret 2010 ke Januari 2011.
Sibuk euy. Sibuk ngapaian ga jelas juga deh.

Anyway, So I'm planning on filling my old blogspot again. Lagipula biarin ajalah tumblr, twitter dan sebagainya itu, pada intinya gw emang jarang ngenet atau ngeblog dan berniat untuk semakin berkurang biar kegiatan di real world lebih produktif. Lagian gw juga udah ga ikutan main RPG lagi jadi sebenernya ga ada urges untuk buru2 ke warnet untuk mereply sebuah thread.

Saya iri sama orang-orang yang kok bisa-bisanya menulis kata-kata yang meuni complicated pisan sampe-sampe otak saya ga nyampe buat memahami 'ini maksudnya apa?' Apalagi kata-kata complicated itu biasanya adalah penggambaran dari mood si penulis at the moment dan si penulis tidak mau menuliskan secara gamblang ada kejadian apa sampe kok bisa-bisanya nulis kek gitu.

I'm not like that. I'm a blunt person. I'm proud of it. Especially if someone knew me from the past, they'd known that I'm different from before. Of course I'm still quiet and I still prefer to talk about myself than to talk about other people (some people said its rude, I say its for preventing from gossiping other people). I'm still smart and I still got a lot of acne all around my face (gpp, tandanya saya masih ABG #plakk!).

I notice that people change, for better or for worse? Its on the eyes of the beholder.

I hope I haven't change much. I know a lot of people doesn't like me very much cos I don't pay a lot of attention to them but it goes vice versa. I feel like sometimes, I could use some company but a lot of times, I feel annoyed if there's a lot of attention goes to me. The point is, I'm being a little selfish right now. I want some attention, but only when I feel like it (and don't expect a vice versa thingy).

Ini gw ngelantur apaan sih?

So close but so far

2011-01-30T12:12:00.002+07:00

Jadi ceritanya gw lagi nonton Oprah dan dia lagi ngasih anjuran menjadikan mobil sebagai daerah bebas telpon. Bahaya. I can see that a lot of people is addicted to their phones (including yours truly) especially if u have a smart phone like an iPhone, blackberry or android. Banyak yang bisa dicek, email, sms, ym, bbm, twitter, dst. Jadi hp hampir ga pernah lepas dari tangan.

Fenomena ini ga cuma berlaku untuk pengguna smartphone, bahkan pengguna hp biasa pun juga addict sama telpnya. Biaya sms yg murah serta fenomena facebook bikin orang2 ga bisa kalo ga ngecek hp minimal setengah jam sekali. Don't get me wrong, gw juga dulu kek gitu. Gw tuh tipe yang lebai, when i'm into something, i'm just gonna keep doing it till i get sick of it. Dulu, gw ga bisa lepas dari hape. I'm addicted to twitter. Sekarang juga masih si tapi bedanya sekarang, gw ga akan berbicara sama orang sambil mata ke hp. I've been there and i don't get why people so mad when i do it. Ternyata setelah gw digituin, i get it.

Malesin.

Ya ga sih?

Kita asik ngomong, curhat, pengen menghabiskan waktu bareng karena kita jarang ketemu tapi dianya malah sibuk ma hp. Hello~ i'm right here~. I hate that. And so, berhubung gw percaya banget dengan pepatah, 'perlakukan orang lain sebagaimana kamu ingin diperlakukan', i don't do it anymore.

I'm proud to myself karna kemarin pas hangout sama temen2 gw, i kept my phone inside my bag. I was there. I was present and it was fun.

Gw sering liat orang2 yang lagi ngumpul di kafe tapi bukannya ngobrol, mereka malah sibuk sama hp masing2. Sad.

Tim Burton Look

2010-03-06T13:18:00.001+07:00

Hey, have you noticed how many cool movies with Tim Burton / Jhonny Depp Movies always have this signature make up of really really really dark smoky eyes? Indicating just how dark the movie is.. Well, my favorite make up Guru, Michelle Phan, make a tutorial make up on youtube on how to make that really really really dark smoky eyes... Tim Burton style.

Go to her channel on youtube and enjoy the rest of her make up tutorial. They're all very cool. =]

I Love This Place

2010-03-02T20:01:00.000+07:00

Do you know what place am I talking about? This place, this town, this suburban place where i have lived for over 10 years now. I used to hate this place. There's nothing here. Not even a movie theater. If I wanna go watch a movie, I have to go to Bogor which is 2 hour drive from my place. The mall is crappy and there's just.. Well its not like Jakarta, that's for sure. I used to live in Jakarta, you know? For about 14 years of my life. I was born there and I was raised by the basic principle of every young Jakartanians : never talk to stranger, always walk straight forwards, don't look around like your confused (celingukan.red), don't get too close to the neighbors, don't do this, don't do that, bla bla bla...

So I got this look from my neighbor as an arrogant person. But I'm NOT! I'm just a quiet person who doesn't talk much and doesn't smile much and have a satire sense of humor and raised not to talk nor smile to stranger or you'll get abducted and sold to some stranger in a far-far away land. Well, its the truth though! I'm not a bad person but its just who I am.

You can guess that I got some sort of culture shock when I first got here. People here demand you to say hi to the neighbors, to gossip in front of the house, to say "punten" to the elderly every time you walk passed them. Its called manner and good behavior. I know all that and I demand manner as well from the people around me (at least that I know) but somehow its really difficult for me to do the same. It took me a few years to finally understand Sundanese (while my sister mastered the language in only a few month!) and I still can't talk Sundanese properly till now. How pathetic. I just don't feel like studying the language. If I like some language, I'll try my best to study it but if I don't like it... well...

I hated here. Its my dream to move back to Jakarta (or at least Bogor, its nearer to Jakarta and its a big city). But you know what? I don't have that dream anymore. You see, a few days back, I was walking to another warnet after finishing surfing at a VERY slow warnet. And at the first warnet, I was torturing my legs. I got cramp, my legs fell a sleep. When I left the warnet, my legs was killing me. I can hardly move. So I was standing there, in front of someone's house that I don't know and there was a couple of 'Bapak-bapak' there. They're chatting in front of their house, enjoying the afternoon. So, I was standing there, bending to my knee, waiting for my legs to feel again, some guy (bapak2 gitu) come to me and suddenly massaging my legs and trying to help my legs to feel again. He advice me about cramps and massaging them till their fine again.

For the record, I was wearing a jilbab and jeans and he wasn't trying to hit on me. He was trying to help me. Sincerely. I was very touched and feel like crying. I said thanks so many times and he just nods saying that its okay and go back to his house to continued the chat with his friends. There's no motives, no... Nothing. He was sincere. I can feel it to the back of my bones. It was heart warming. Its the first time I feel like... I'm home. I don't wanna move to Jakarta, Bogor, Bandung or other big cities. This heart warming scene only exist in the small city where the people are nice and they know their neighbors (of course, 5 km range from their house are all siblings). Well, the point is... I love where I am right now and I thank the Lord for putting me here since years ago. =]

Do u regret it?

2010-02-27T11:00:00.001+07:00

Good morning, fellas!

So today i got my hair done by my sister. I got my hair washed and blow dryed. My hair look great. Even my fringe fall in the right place. Its just that few moments in my life when i don't have a bad hair day. Its a perfect hair day. Even my powder and lipstick look great. I'm as cute as my friend Jun (who is praised for having a cute face by lurino at twitter).

I was planning to go to Bogor today (yes, to a mall) and watch a movie with a couple of networld friends. I wanted to show off my perfect hair to my friends and show them that i'm not always look that mature (a.k.a old). I look like a teenager with my short hair (i'm not making things up! >.<) and maybe i'm gonna meet someone cute at the mall or catch some 'brondong'. Lol!

But what about my jilbab?

I was sitting long and frustrated in front of the mirrorr with jilbab in my hand and my sister awaits me to go to Bogor. I wanted to show off my hair and show the world that i'm not always that lame and 'lusuh' (can't find the right word in English).

In the end, i put on my cover and go to Bogor. Even though my mom always supported me for NOT wearing my jilbab, i'm not wearing it for anyone but myself. =]

Where is ur happyness lies?

2010-02-26T08:03:00.001+07:00

Hai, bloggers and facebookers (i linked my blogs to my facebook notes so more people can read my random thoughts :p) long time no blog. =] well, i've been busy with my tumblr since its a lot easier to update. Simply just send an email via my blackberry to my tumblr's email and it'll be updated in no time. I know i could do the same thing with blogger but i don't know how to set the email address. :-S blogger should've made things a little simpler for its user. -__-

Oh, well. Enough with the pointless rambling. =]

So where does your happiness lies? I know its in u somewhere. I can't remember the last time i feel pure joy and happiness and satisfaction. I feel comfortable, yes. I feel a slight feeling of relieve, yes. But not joy. When other people get to be a civil service officer from the gorvenment, a.k.a PNS they got overwhelmed with joy. Espescially when ur hardwork finally get recognition from ur boss and u get an offer to fill a-soon-to-be-empty position at the office with harsh responsibility where its demand maturity and quick thinking. I never wanted that position. No. While i know some people get over joy by the news, i'm not. I don't feel anything but a huge burden on my shoulder. I just wanna live a normal quite life but it just not happening!

What should i do? Should i refuse the position? Either way i won't be starving even if i don't have that position. I know some places that will take me in, in no time. Its a dillema for me cos i'm proud to be appointed to this position. Means i'm trusted and assumed capable to this position. This means more hard work and more consideration to my conscious.

This new job demand me to act all mature while i feel a little bit dissapointed cos i feel comfortable to my position as the youngest at the office. I can't abuse my 'youngest' position anymore and i feel burden and troublesome cos of my age. Will they listen to me? Will they have respect on me? I don't know. Its all depend on my future attitude won't it?

Is this a gift or a test from god? I tend to choose the second one.

I don't feel grateful. Thats the reason of my unhappiness. I need to talk to someone. Its been a long time since i talk to my friends.

Is this what it takes to be an adult? *sigh.

I'm the girl here... =="

2010-01-31T16:49:00.000+07:00

celo
GW!!! Terutama lagi gw bosen diliatin cowok kalo ke mall *keingetan ada cowok yang jalan bareng ceweknya ngeliatin gw sampe badannya balik*

gw rasa statement diatas cukup menjelaskan apa maksud dari judul blog ini. =="

Fyi, Celo itu cowok.

Etos Kerja

2010-01-21T09:41:00.000+07:00

Have u ever watch this movie? Ada rerunnya kemaren di Global TV. Dah lama keknya tapi gw tetep nonton juga walaupun dah pernah nonton di bioskop. Pas nonton di bioskop, rasanya ga ada kesan yang berarti di situ kecuali bahwa filmnya cukup entertaining, cukup mirip ama novelnya, Meryl Streep was amazing there (as always) dan Anne Hathaway clothes was stunning! Tapi pas gw nonton lagi di tv, ada sesuatu yang lain yang menangkap perhatian gw, adegan pas si Miranda (Meryl Streep) minta supaya Andy (Anne Hathaway) ngasih anak-anaknya buku Harry Potter yang belum terbit karena mereka penasaran sama ceritanya. Ceritanya Miranda lagi balas dendam karena Andy membiarkan dia terlantar di Miami karena hujan badai padahal besoknya anak-anaknya ada pementasan ballet.

Ceritanya saat Andy berkeluh kesah sama Nigel, temennya di kantor, Nigel bilang itu semua karena dia tidak bersungguh-sungguh pada pekerjaannya. Dia menganggap pekerjaannya di bidang fashion itu tolol, dan fashion sendiri itu cuma kegiatan konyol para shopaholic. Ketika Andy mulai bersungguh-sungguh, hasilnya keren banget. Andy ngasih 1 copy naskah buku harpot yang udah dijilid di meja Miranda sementara masing-masing anak kembarnya dapat 1 copy yang saat itu sedang berada di kereta menuju rumah neneknya, bahkan sebelum disuruh untuk melakukannya.

Itu, menurut gw, keren. Melakukan sesuatu sebelum disuruh dan memberikan lebih dari ekspektasi adalah bawahan yang pengen dimiliki setiap atasan. Bawahan seperti itu akan menjadi andalan oleh bosnya. Bersungguh-sungguh dalam pekerjaannya. Really, i really wanna be like that.

Btw, I'm quitting that blog thingie. Being a good employee meaning you get paid on time by your boss.

Never Ever...

2010-01-18T18:09:00.000+07:00

Gw selalu begini. Setiap kali selalu pengen, setelah nyoba dan ngerasa ga cocok, gw ga pernah mau lagi ngelakuin itu. Sekali coba lagi karena lupa gimana rasanya trus ternyata malah jadi disaster, gw langsung kapok dan ga pernah ngelakuin lagi.

Pasti bingung maksud gw apa. Maksud gw ya, karena gw orangnya sirikan, gw suka sirik sama orang-orang yang mempunyai kemampuan yang gw ga punya. Kek misalnya waktu itu gw pengen jadi MC, pengen tau gimana rasanya buat jadi orang yang ada di depan layar biarpun gw tau persis kemampuan gw itu jauh lebih maksimal jadi orang yang dibalik layar. 2 Kali gw jadi MC. Sekali pas ospek kampus (don't ask. Malu2in!) sekali lagi ketika ada acara IH, WBD kalo ga salah (ha. ha. ha.). Dua kali ya... Setelah itu, gw bahkan ga mau pegang mic lagi di depan massa. Bahkan buat pengumuman pun gw ga mau (soalnya pernah dan gw cuma diketawain dianggap sambil lalu gitu). Sumpah ya gw parno. Ga akan pernah lagi jadi MC.

Dan sekarang... jadi ketua panitia. Perdana nih. Hasilnya... Full of dottness. Lol.

Entah. Gw ga mau parno sendiri. =]

My name is....

2010-01-18T17:59:00.000+07:00

Its not Rere. Apalagi ReRe Chan. I mean its not my real name. My real name is… Reni Handayani Mirza Putri. I hold the record of having the longest characters in a name from kindergarden to college. I know that noawadays, people have longer names than I do (don’t know if its a tren) but back then, some people don’t even have a last name. Just one name and that’s it.

Funny thing about sundanese people is that their name usually in repetition so its not a family name. Like : Titin Suritin. Well, not like that, but close enough. Lol. Some Bataknese, wore their family name with proud as it shows their tribe or marga suku. My family is padangnese (no, I’ve never been to Padang before, there’s no one there) so I have my family’s name, which is Mirza, showing my tribe family name (dah kek apaan aja pake tribe segala. Lol) and the rest have no meaning whatsoever.

Once I asked my dad, what’s the meaning of my name, seeing my friends name has really cool meaning, and as far as I know, a childs name is a parents prayers. But the answer was pretty standard. My dad said that my name resembles his bosses daughter. So it was a lickass thingie, I guess, lol. Well, in his defence, he said that his bossess daughter has really good manner and smart, too. So he wishes that I have the same attitude like his bosses daughter. Can u believe it? Being compared just as u was born! How cool is that? Not to mention I have at least 1 person to have the same name as I do at school starting from middle to high school.

Well, I am pretty smart, as my dad wishes, but I don’t know about being obidiance and all that crap. Lol. Rere comes from a part of my name, re-and living between sundanese people, u just HAVE to repeat it-so it became Rere. I use it for my username on many forums so if u see a rerechan out there somewhere, that would be me. Tee hee.

Wow, this is long!

(copas dari tumblr buat bahan blog karena hape gw chargerannya ketinggalan di Ndhez)

Okay, I admitted..

2010-01-15T22:14:00.001+07:00

I cheated from blogger.

I have a tumblr account so you'll see me there from time to time and less here from time to time (halah!)

Come and visit : www.rere-scribble.tumblr.com

So have u read my blog? Mostly its in English, right? So u have seen how bad I am in my English, minimum vocabulary, terrible grammar, pathetic spelling, etc. Makes me wanna hang myself...

I'm usually better at this. Language thingie, I mean. I'm the top of my class on English from kindergarden all the way to college. And now just look at my English. Its pathetic! I barely use it, I rarely watch US movies/series, I barely read novels or magz in English, I don't speak much English (to whom?) So I have no way to improve my English!

The reason why I'm saying this is cos I'm extremely jealous seeing p#3 post (about avatar the movie) as she wrote in English so fluently. No mistakes, no misspelling like I always do. I'm so utterly jealous of her english capability right now, AND she can speak/write Japanese (though not fluently). Making me envy her even more cos I want to be able to speak/write/read another language as well, such as Mandarin/Cantonese, French, Japanese, etc. Me want.

I think I need to buy (or borrow) a novel in English.

#MOOVEit

2010-01-13T16:21:00.001+07:00

Hashtag itu adalah hashtag yang dibuat oleh www.twitter.com/mommiesdaily sebuah site yang mengumpulkan para ibu-ibu dari seluruh indonesia untuk saling berbagi tentang kegiatan mereka sebagai seorang ibu dan juga sebagai seorang wanita dan istri (or single parents). I think the site is pretty good but I'm not really that interested cos I'm still single and childless. But when I read people that I follow (mostly from @fashionesedaily) I found out that the site is going to give away 1.000 UHT milk box to childrens in the streets.

I am sooo jealous by it. I supposed to think about it too! I always thought of how can I help this needy child to get money but off the streets. Seems like an impossible job! Cos the kids doesn't want to go to school, they want to play on the streets and get some money while their parents is too lazy to get their ass up and get a real job instead telling their kids to go to school and stay away from the streets. These kids are exploited by iresponsible adults and they have no power whatsoever. What these kids doing is only what they've been told by the adults around them. And when they become an adult themselves, they treat their child the same way cos its the only way they know. Its sad. Its sad how poverty works, keeping your heart cold and mean, for the sake of money.

Giving money to these really thin pathetic children is no use, I agree. But what to do? They are malnourish and very thin. They barely eat and wear decent clothing. I rarely give them money but if I do have money in my hand, I really want to give some to them, but its un-educating! So the idea of giving away milk for the kids is really a cause that I support of. I want to help if I can but the only thing I can do is to help retweet and follow them, even though I wanna help more. But I can't cos I don't have any money and cos I'm too busy to help the cause in action.

I think, when u stop thinking about "me" u start to see things. Well, maybe its the age factor but its a good thing. =]

Btw, a quick shout out to a couple of my friends :
@hanihanito : get something to eat or u'll die just eating smoke!
@tiyanasigi : thanks for making me realise how old I am. :)

AVATAR - P#3

2010-01-11T16:15:00.000+07:00

Hi, this is not Rerechan's entry.
It's P#3's entry.

I'm sure everyone already watched the James Cameron 3D film AVATAR right?
So, what do you think? Is it just another beautifully done 3D film that only satisfied your vision and immagination or there's something else behind it?

I decide to write this entry because I can still read about AVATAR's success in the box office around the world and there's one thing that I never read about in those box office success article (or maybe I haven't find the article yet).

To me, AVATAR is like a mirror. A huge mirror that's suddenly put in front of every living (or dead) human being that walk (walked) this planet, so we can all see what we've done and are doing to this planet. Destroying it. Slowly but sure, we are destroying our own planet, our only home, the only place in this universe where we can live (for now - because, who knows, maybe one day we can actually live on the moon or other planets). Like what Jake said to the Tree of Souls the night before the battle. We killed our own mother (nature).

Talking about mother nature, did anyone realize that our nature is showing weird behaviour? extreme weather (cold & hot), the rise of the sea level, the melting of ice in the coldest places in this planet? massive natural disaster that killed thousands of people worldwide? Would you see it as a sign of mother nature's warning that she's hurting and wants us to stop whatever terrible things that we do to her or just another normal natural disaster that happens elsewhere but our home?

Again, quoting Neytiri's words to Jake the night before the battle, " The Mother only protects the balance of life". It makes me wonder, if all the weird signs mother nature is showing us now is to prevent her from hurting us even more than we hurt her. Because either way, mother nature will win. Whether this planet will be green again or will all be nothing but sun and sand or snow covered land, she wins. Maybe that is the way she protects the balance of life.

Or, maybe it's just me......

Watch out SNSD, Reflector Power is Coming Your Way...

2010-01-10T12:13:00.003+07:00

So there's a new Girl Group in town, Reflector Power. Consist of 3 beautiful ladies (i think), the three have the up most talent that most girls would envy about. They can sing (noticed first at Bus Damri going to Dago, Bandung, ngamen), they can dance (noticed first at the Jaipongan Dance Competition) and they are uber gorgeous (i think)! Even Super Junior's Siwon think that their charm is irresistable when he was spotted eating a gorengan using wrapping of the Reflector Power picture and the ever charming Shinee's MinHo spotted giving them receh on their latest concert at Dago Damri Bus! Ooohh.. I envy them.

SNSD? Brown Eyed Girls? Kara? Lewaaattt!!

2010 belongs to Reflector Power!

Have you heard?

2010-01-06T21:59:00.001+07:00

I got the job!! Oh. My. God! It feels like a blessing in disguise! Except the fact that I think I'm not grateful nor thankful enough to the Lord for everything Allah has gave me.^^

Ok, so I'm being a little religious here. Its kinda sweet, huh? Lol! Its just that the timing couldn't be anymore perfect. Just when I was feeling a little depress cos of my bad money management, and its getting worse in this period of time.. Well, I'm not PNS yet and there's so much to pay around the house, I'm not sure I can afford it. And that's when this news come to my ear. My net friend Manda, who really hate Japanese and Korean stuff suddenly asked me where can she get the latest news about Korean and Japanese news.

So long story short, Manda was working as a blog writer for her friend, writing about the latest news of Kpop and Jpop. Its like my dream job! To write about something that I actually like! And getting paid for it! Its not much, only 3k per post but in a week? A month? Like, 5-10 posts a day? That's a lot of money! Oh, God how much I was relieved when Manda told me that there's still vacancies for the job, and I could take the job right away. And I did it right away... I just posted 5 entries for the blog and I totally love it! The only weakness is... My office internet connection is working perfectly fine but the computer (and laptop!) Is not working!

So I have to go to warnet. Sigh.

I love warnet but I usually go there to watch videos that I like, not to work.

I need smart ISP.

You know what's good in 2010?

2010-01-06T06:08:00.001+07:00

Is too much twittering. Twitter is like the next best thing after Yahoo! Messenger. I mean, just HOW many Indonesian people use twitter. Just this other day, I was checking Trending Topic (or we call it TT) and to my surprise, the TT was... Yang. Anyone know what 'yang' is? Its not a foreign language. Its a verb in indonesian language. Its like... Wow! Just how many Indonesian people are tweeting?!

Indonesian people are known for their hospitality and how much they love to socialized. Without a doubt, I consider twitter not only as a micro blog but also as a fun socializing place. I love that place! A friend of mine even told me to blog more cos I haven't been blogging for a week cos of twitter (which I thought was just nonsense cos what I wrote on twitter is just random unimportant things fufu).

its kinda like plurk, but its different. I like twitter better cos there are some people that I don't really like doesn't join twitter. Ha! Or they join twitter but they enjoy plurk much more.

Well, the latest TT was kinda funny. A girl name Rana went to TT and blasted to top 3! The girl offended a lot of Indonesian people cos she call a blackberry user (like myself) and twitter user (myself included) as 'alay'. An indonesian slang for cheesy or people from the 'hood'. I was laughing about it, but better yet, I was admiring just how many indonesian people love to tweet! From mobile phone, tweetdeck, blackberry, iphone, whatever.. Its just plain weird how indonesian people love twitter.

And one other funny thing... Bono was also on TT at the same time as Rana does but when people were asking "who is Rana?" They were also asking "who is Bono?" Lol!

Bono is a vocalist for U2, a famous band from Ireland, people.

Indonesia oh Indonesia. Lol!

Do u ever get that feeling...

2010-01-04T06:36:00.001+07:00

When ur holding money in ur hand u just can't wait to spend it all at once? I mean, u see all that money on ur hands and u think to urself: 'Okay, what's the fastest and easiest way to spend all this money?'

And this is happening all-the-time.

I'm sure my friend Jun have the same feeling as me but lucky for her, she have a very strict mother who saved all her money and give her allowence like a 15 year old. Lol. I think its a.good thing, especially if u haven't learn how to manage ur money.

Funny thing, though, I love to watch Oprah and when the show is talking about money management, I got all excited, thinking; I can learn this, its easy, how come some people just have no respect on the money they earn so hard? And so on. Such noble feelings when the truth is, I am no different from them.

So I'm thinking to re-think how I view money. I'm getting tired to do this unbreakable devils chain of having money, spend it all before the end of the month, have no savings when I could save a few thousand (rupiah), playing too much out of town (jakarta, bogor, depok and soon, jogja), not thinking enough about my parents share, etc.

So, #in2010... Wish me rich! *halah*

A question...

2010-01-03T23:07:00.001+07:00

Pake jilbab tapi jarang sholat.

What do you think?

Its normal as human being untuk lalai dalam melaksanakan kewajibannya yang memang dibebankan kepada setiap muslim di dunia ini. Jilbab ini bisa sangat membebani dan ya... Gw emang jarang sholat meskipun pake jilbab. I'm working on it though. That's why I wore it at the first place... To protect me from bad people whenever I come home late from somewhere, to feel comfortable and good about myself without worrying on bad hair day or disasterous fashion sense, and to remind myself that I have to be a good muslim cos afterall, whatelse do I have?

Terkesan hipokrit kah? =]

Once upon a time at Indomaret

2010-01-01T21:20:00.000+07:00

"Ini saja, Bu, belanjaannya?"

"Iya,"

"Umm, ini minuman beralkohol lho, Bu. Ga kelihatan memang karena tidak ada label alkoholnya,"

"Iya, saya tahu ini minuman beralkohol,"

"Oh..."

*dalam hati : 'mentang-mentang gw pake jilbab. Cih.'*

-------------------------------

a funny story yang terbentuk di dalam otak ketika melihat deretan bir di alfamart deket kantor. Lol.

IndoHogwarts Writing and Design Workshop

2009-12-31T11:42:00.003+07:00

Bekerja sama dengan Penerbitan Sygma, Forum Indonesia Membaca dan Library@batavia

IndoHogwarts presents...
A Writing and Design Workshop : Do and Make it Fun!

What?
Workshop Writing and Design

Who?
Open for anyone!

When?
Minggu, 17 Januari 2010
Pukul 09.30 - 12.30 WIB

Where?
Musium Bank Mandiri
Jl. Stasiun Lapangan Stasiun No. 1 Jakarta Barat (seberang Stasiun dan terminal JakTrans Kota)

Pembicara antara lain :
1. Maaya Hiroshi (Penulis Novel Arquella)
2. Rani Iskandar (Penerbit Sygma)
3. Linda Liang (Dosen Universitas Binus / Admin IndoHogwarts)
4. Dessya Putri (Mahasiswi DKV Binus)

Selama Workshop peserta akan mendapatkan :
1. Snack
2. Sertifikat
3. CD berisi materi dari pembicara writing and design serta sebuah program Photoshop Portable)

Jumlah peserta dibatasi sebanyak 50 orang dikarenakan keterbatasan ruangan dan Wi-Fi pun tersedia bagi peserta yang ingin memakai internet menggunakan laptop pribadi. Bagi para peserta yang ingin langsung mempraktekkan Workshop penulisan dan desain dianjurkan untuk membawa laptop masing-masing, jika tidak mempunyai/membawa laptop selama workshop maka panitia kan menyediakan laptop yang dapat digunakan beberapa orang peserta sekaligus (tergantung jumlah peserta yang hadir).

HTM : Rp. 15.000,- (lima belas ribu rupiah)
Ditransfer ke :
Bank Mandiri : 1020004985575 a.n. Ardani Sri Handayani
Bank BCA : 5270671855 a.n. Presty Pramasiwi

Setelah pembayaran, peserta dapat menghubungi kontak dibawah ini untuk konfirmasi :

1. Iris (0818 0736 0373)
YM/email : shea.lilica@yahoo.com
facebook : misaki_crimson@yahoo.com

2. Thiwy (0856 9188 3610)
YM/email/facebook : thiwy_is_here@yahoo.com

Kegiatan Menulis dan Desain akan sangat berguna bagi siapa saja dimana saja, menulis esai, makalah, skripsi, novel, cerpen, FF, surat, laporan, dll. Sementara workshop desain akan sangat berguna untuk mereka yang ingin belajar menggunakan photoshop atau melatih kemampuan desain mereka dengan belajar hal-hal baru.

Bring your laptop, we got WI-FI!

Be There!

Ps : WE NEED YOUR HELP!
Go to this facebook page, dan klik "undang orang untuk datang" atau "invite people" lalu undang SEMUA teman facebookmu. Hehe XD

And YOU... Be THERE! XD

Recha McFadden

2009-12-29T12:15:00.001+07:00

She's a lady. A very beautiful lady. I created her. She so elegant and a very 'nice' serpent lady. I totally love her. She's like the first chara I ever made. I never wrote anything before and she was my first. She stays when everyone else dissapears. She stand tall when everyone get deleted. I love her so much.

My only problem is... I don't have a plot or a future plan for her (or any of my other original characters, in this case). So I just go with the flow, if anyone wants to play with her, I let them. I said yes. I never say no.

Untill she have this image on her : a bitch, a slut. I totally hate that.

I love her soooo much but what's wrong with these people? Why do they take her so 'easy'? Its not right! Its like I'm being hurt as well! I don't know if this is what u called 'blending' but it really hurt me to see my baby becoming a bitch like that. :(

Its a motherly feeling probably.

Recha, if ur a human....

Please don't kill me.

If you find...

2009-12-27T07:26:00.001+07:00

.... What ur looking for, would u be happy eventually?

I have a friend. He's a man, travelling around Java Island, trying to look for something. Something that he had but now its long gone. What is it? I don't know and I'm not sure if I want to know without loosing my temper. But whatever he's trying to find, I wish him good luck and I'm praying to God that he won't die before finally found what he's been looking for.

There are some people like that, actually leaving just to try and find what they had lost, some, they could only cry, weap, cursing cos of what they lost. Me? I don't even know if I have something to be lost. :)

My dear, u may not know me, and I may not know u that well. But our life has crossed and I think of u as a dear friend so I dare myself to ask this question : "If u finally found what ur looking for, will u finally be happy?"

Hope u won't die before u found what ur looking. :)

Sebuah pesan.

2009-12-26T23:01:00.001+07:00

Kepada Saudara Nyuss, yang nama aslinya tidak saya ketahui tapi saya tahu dengan pasti bahwa anda masih berkeliaran di dunia networld, ol YM dengan identitas baru, mungkin masih bermain RP dengan chara baru yang tak dikenal, tapi yang jelas masih berhubungan dengan keluarga neraka generasi pertama (dari mana saya tahu? Silahkan mampir ke blog Sapu).

Kepada Saudara Nyuss, dengan sejujurnya saya berharap dengan sungguh-sungguh bahwa anda menganggap saya sebagai teman anda, tapi ternyata anda tidak menganggap saya demikian walaupun saya ingin sekali menjadi teman anda. Meskipun kita jarang chat dan setiap chat saya hanya menyusahkan anda saja dengan pertanyaan teknis yang sebenarnya bisa dengan mudah terpecahkan dengan mencari di google (maafkan saya yang menganggap anda sebagai google manusia), tapi saya sejujurnya sangat menikmati pembicaraan kita tentang hal-hal umum terutama tentang hobi kita yang kurang lebih sama yaitu menonton film dan tv series.

Sejujurnya saya sering bertanya-tanya apakah Saudara Nyuss yang tidak saya ketahui namanya ini masih sering mengunjungi blog saya yang isinya nyampah semua ini dan membacanya. Sejujurnya saya tersenyum ketika dia menagih postingan blog saya karena bosan di kantor karena saya merasa dia menghargai isi pemikiran saya yang kelewat sederhana ini.

Dan sejujurnya saya katakan bahwa saya iri kepada Sapu dan siapapun yang mempunyai alamat YM anda yang baru dan bisa bercengkrama dengan anda kapan pun mereka mau.

Saya. Iri.

Sekian dan terima kasih.

What do you do when...

2009-12-24T00:04:00.002+07:00

Ur bored, u wanna read some good books but u don't have any money to buy any? (Books, especially the good ones, is quite expensive)

Well, you go to www.indohogwarts.com, log in if ur already registered, go to the ff section and read anything and everything that Miss Praditta wrote.

Fucking awesome, I don't mind having some personal battle with mosquitoes in my house.

The mosquitoes are vicious!

2009-12-23T14:52:00.001+07:00

Is it so wrong to expect u to act nice to me?
Does some people thinks that 'nice' is the same as 'fake'?
Why am I expecting the impossible?
I should've just give up a long time a go.
A very dangerous Pandora's Box.
Someone reminded me to never open the box.
You should've reminded me earlier.

Once upon a time

2009-12-21T17:53:00.001+07:00

Di sebuah kantor pemda di Kabupaten X, terdapatlah seorang ibu Kasubbid bahenol yang terkenal bangor dan berpakaian ketat, marilah kita panggil dia dengan sebutan ibu kasubbid X, dan seorang Kabid yang juga terkenal bangor, sebutlah Kabid X. Perlu diketahui bahwa posisi Kabid adalah membawahi Kasubbid.

Pada saat waktu menunjukkan pukul 15.40 WIB, para ibu-ibu berkumpul di mobil bapak sekretaris kantor pemda itu berhubung mereka bermaksud untuk menebeng di mobil bapak sekretaris karena rumah mereka searah semua. Ibu X agak terlambat sampai-sampai harus diklakson oleh supir bapak sekretaris. Ternyata ibu kasubbid X sedang meminta sisa snack rapat tadi siang kepada bapak Kabid X. Karena sisa banyak, dia mengambil sedus, untuk dibagikan seisi mobil yang akan menumpang di mobil bapak sekretaris.

Pada saat si ibu kasubbid X ini menaiki mobil, posisinya agak sulit karena si ibu X ini harus menaruh dusnya dulu di mobil baru ikut naik. Kabid X ini kemudian mencolek bagian vital (diantara dua kaki) si ibu kasubbid X ini! Salah seorang ibu-ibu di kantor pemda X itu menyaksikan kejadian itu dengan mata melotot dan tangan terkepal. Ia marah-marah kepada kabid X itu tapi dia sendiri tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa karena ibu kasubbid X itu tidak mengatakan apa-apa. Saya yang memperhatikan dari dalam mobil hanya bisa berkata "astaghfirullah" dan terdiam. Ikut memaki dalam hati sementara memandang sinis si ibu kasubbid X yanh ketika mobil sudah berjalan pergi hanya tertawa dan mengatakan bahwa 'untungnya' dia sedang menstruasi maka si kabid X ini tidak menyentuh organ pribadinya dia.

Bisa anda bayangkan perasaan saya mendengar suara tawa si ibu X sepanjang perjalanan?

Sepanjang jalan saya berkhayal, bagaimana kalau itu terjadi pada saya, ketika saya membayangkan berbagai reaksi yang (seharusnya) saya lakukan, saya teringat pada reaksi saya ketika berbagai pelecehan terjadi pada saya. Apa yang saya lakukan saat itu?

Its just another day at work.

3 in 1

2009-12-19T06:28:00.001+07:00

Ini bukan cerita mengenai jockey 3 in 1 di Jakarta, melainkan tentang kebodohan gw menghilangkan 3 barang dalam 1 hari.
1. Digicam kantor. Hilang pada saat memfoto acara penutupan event pelatihan Kepala Desa yang baru diangkat beserta istri dan Sekretaris Desa yang baru aja diangkat PNS dimana gw adalah panitia event dan berusaha mengumpulkan uang untuk pergi ke Bandung. Gw taro di atas meja setelah selesai acara penutupan dan gw sibuk ngurusin pembagian uang transport untuk peserta istri kepala desa dan... Whush! Ilang! Gw lupa klo gw harusnya pegang kamera karna biasanya emang itu bukan tugas gw pegang kamera, biasanya gw bagian apapun yang berhubungan ama komputer dan ketika gw coba oper kamera ke yang biasa megang, dia malah nolak (mungkin males) dan kesimpulannya : hilang.
2. Flashdisk 1 GB gw. Pada saat otw pulang setelah insiden tidak menyenangkan itu, gw dapet sms dari Barley, wartawan dari JakartaGlobe yang ingin mewawancarai IndoHogwarts. Gw yang lagi numpang mobil orang kantor langsung turun (karena emang udah mesti turun) cari warnet terdekat dan mulai sibuk ngurusin interviewnya. (Btw, Lian yang jadinya ngurus interviewnya karena pas gw udah jelasin gimana IH berdiri, ni orang masih mau penjelasan lebih detail, lah, gw bukan pendiri IH mau lebih detail gimana cara?) Trus gw keingetan sama niat gw waktu hari-hari berbengong ria jadi panitia klo gw mau cari model blazer ama maxi dress buat jahit ntar di tukang jahit deket rumah. Pas lagi di warnet karena kebetulan gw lama banget di warnet nungguin Lian ngejawabin pertanyaan yang dikiriimin ke gw via email yang kemudian gw forward emailnya ke dia (and later I found out that she was on her way to Bandung, and I was like wtf?! Katanya ke TMII ambil berkas kuliah?!). Story goes, ada acara pawai yang ngelewatin jalanan berhubung tahun baru Islam dan gw jadi terdistract, apalagi gw juga membuang waktu dengan nonton video sambil tersibukkan oleh bawaan gw yang naujubile dah kek orang pindahan, long story short, gw baru inget pas lagi di mobil mau pulang (btw, itu warnet ada di kota, jarak pp kesana dari rumah gw itu 1 jam lebih dan dah malem pula pas gw inget) flashdisk gw masih nempel di komputer warnet itu. Berhubung itu flashdisk isinya ga ada yang penting, sizenya kecil, bukan punya bos gw yang isinya tesis dia dan bisa gawat klo ilang, gw di mobil masih bisa santai-santai aja.
3. Mukena dan headset bb gw. Mukena ketinggalan dan headset bb ketinggalan adalah murni kecerobohan gw. Padahal waktu gw lagi rapi2 gw dah ngecek isi tas tapi entah gimana masih aja ketinggalan. Bodoh kan? Untungnya orang hotel itu baik-baik semua, minimal klo misalnya kantong merah isi headset itu kebuang karna ga pada sadar apa isinya, paling ga mukena gw pasti disimpenin. Oh, well, untuk headset gw emang ga terlalu berharap. Ketemu syukur, ga juga gpp. Karena bb gw ngehang mulu klo dengerin lagu via headset and I'm not planning to ever sell any of my cell (I collected cellphone) so its really no biggy.

The point is :
I cannot believe my stupidness to be able to lost three item all in one day. And its a fine damn one!

I have to be more responsible to other people's stuff! (Punya orang.wajib untuk dapet perhatian lebih, punya diri ndiri mah bodo amat).

Like what I said to Uchan : asal bukan kepala gw yang ilang, yang lainnya masih bisa dibeli.

Are you cool enough?

2009-12-16T06:09:00.001+07:00

Definition of 'cool' : the opposite of warm; not so hot and not so cold; what inside the fridge; etc.

Well, you feel cool in the morning, hot in the day, and then cool again in the afternoon. But that's not what I'm going to talk about. No, no, no....

For some people at school, being cool means that you have to have an award for a couple of achievement; being the popular kid; wears lots of make up; being different and emo; active at sport; always smiling and cheerful; smart and the top of the class; the class joker; queen bee; dropdead gorgeous, totally rich; etc.

For some people in the crowd, cool means to stand out or probably to keep low, to wear a spesific clothing that defines ur community, to be a fashionista, to wear label clothing, to be modest and simple, to wears lots of colors, to be bulky, to be skinny, to have muscles, to have that preppy look, to be beautiful, etc.

For some people at work, cool means to become the boss, the easy going person, to be the gossiper, to have a second job, to be making loads of money, to have a car, to do the job that you love, etc.

For some people at the club, cool means, the DJ, the cool dancer, sexy clothing, label clothing, drinking and smoking, or not to drink yet smoke, to have an ons with some random drunk, to dance on top of the bar desk, hanging out with a lot of people, know 90% of the people who visit the club, mastercard, platinum membership, dropdead gorgeous, etc.

To be cool online : have an active account on every social networking online, to have as much online friends as possible till your account get suspended, to have a chat list full of friends from different online community, to always be online even if ur driving, have more followers than people you follow on twitter, have a fansite dedicated for you, to tweet a lot, to tweet less, to always update your facebook status, actually owning a facebook, updated blog, having more blog than one, etc.

Some people think its cool, some people think its just lame, I prefer to think that I'm cool. B-)

Selfish

2009-12-15T12:44:00.001+07:00

Definisi selfish atau dalam bahasa Indonesianya : egois. Tiap orang punya pendapatnya masing-masing tentang definisi egois ini dan meskipun di wikipedia ada arti dan definisi juga di KBBI tapi gw masukin opini gw aja untuk definisinya (berhubung gw di hape jadi ga bisa copas dari KBBI dan wiki).

Egois adalah mementingkan diri sendiri. Sifat karakteristik manusia yang katanya lebih mementingkan diri sendiri dan ga peduli tentang perasaan atau kondisi orang lain. Kata orang karakteristik ini lebih sering dimiliki oleh anak kecil maka dari itu kalau ada orang yang mempunyai kecenderungan untuk egois sering disebut kekanakkan.

Kenapa gw membahas tentang karakteristik ini? Karena seorang teman mengatakan bahwa gw seperti itu. Terus terang aja gw belum pernah dibilang kek gitu karena mungkin no one would bother to say that, tapi karena kebetulan kami berdua pernah bermasalah dia bilang masalah gw adalah gw tipe yang repot sama perasaan ndiri tapi ga peduli sama perasaan orang lain. Klo dalam bahasa umum dan dalam pengertian gw yang dangkal mungkin bisa dibilang gw ini egois ya? Lol!

Oh, yea gw agak shock karena dikatakan bahwa gw mempunyai sifat yang dimiliki oleh each and every person on this earth. Hey, I aint no saint. :) dan bisa saya pastikan siapapun yang kenal ama gw pasti bisa meyakinkan anda bahwa I aint no saint! Lol.

Tentu saja gw egois. Gw mengakui sifat gw ini. Menurut lo gw bakalan cari seribu alasan untuk menyangkal? Semua orang yang kenal gw tahu kalau gw orang yang ga pernah menyangkal tentang sifat jelek gw. Dan kejelekan gw yang lain adalah : I'm proud of my bad characters. Aneh ya? Keknya cuma gw doank yang bangga sama semua kejelekan yang gw miliki. Termasuk soal yang satu ini.

Gw adalah orang yang hanya mementingkan diri sendiri dan hanya tertawa pada kesulitan orang lain (terutama yang ga gw kenal) dan agak ga peduli dengan perasaan tu orang. Hahah I can see ur all nodding ur head. I am this kind of person dan buat gw its okay. So far gw belum pernah ngerasa harus berubah.

Gw ga bakalan pernah bisa merasakan perasaan orang lain karena yang paling tahu perasaan orang itu hanyalah dia sendiri. Disaat gw sedang ceria ketawa-ketawa dan orang lain curhat ke gw dengan sebegitu sedihnya ampe nangis-nangis I won't be able to feel it would I? I wouldn't understand ur feeling. Even if I am as upset as the other person, we still wouldn't feel the same cos we are different people with different ways of handling things. Boleh dibilang empati gw kurang menjurus ke minus tapi apakah itu salah? Menurut sebagian orang mungkin itu salah untuk tidak memiliki empati tapi menurut gw itu praktis.

Dari pada gw menghabiskan waktu untuk meratapi sebuah masalah yang sebenernya bukan masalah gw melainkan masalah orang lain? Mending juga gw musingin masalah gw ndiri.

Praktis kan?

I am not heartless. I'm just practical.

Do you have any?

2009-12-14T11:40:00.001+07:00

Dreams, I mean.

Sesuatu yang disebut mimpi, cita-cita, keinginan, pandangan hidup jauh ke depan, dst. Its called dreams. Just watch a random pop culture Japan Drama and you'll see what I mean. I don't particularly like that kind of drama. At first it was fun, a new kind of drama for me other than mandarin drama and sinetron. But I find it boring after a while. Its ridiculously boring.

My friend (via ym chat) told me that I have no dreams. And she's right, of course. I have no problem having no dreams while some people think that I have no life without a dream. Does living your life just-like-that day by day be consider as zombie?

I know what I want, I want a computer set, a second battery for my bb, a new house at Bogor cos our house contract is soon to end, to move to another district while this district is divided (don't really know the English for Kabupaten), etc. And the list still go on. But does this all be consider as a dream? You tell me.

Is it cos I'm stuck that I have no dreams? I already have a job and I can afford anything I want as long as I save some money and of course the next thing to do in the normal human norm is to get married, have babies, have grandkids, retired and die. Its not something you can call a dream, right? Its just something you have to do in order to fulfil society's demand. Your parents demand, your co-workers demand, etc.

So how exactly do you have something called dream? I wonder.

If you know, would you please kindly tell me?

Via twitter would be great. *ditabok*

Words is not enough

2009-12-07T05:51:00.002+07:00

Its never enough.

Words should be followed by action.
Action should be followed by movement.
Then change would come eventually.

Do you realize what you're doing? Just talking and saying those words without actually doing something. You know it would get you nowhere, but you keep doing it anyway, just to relieve your stress. You keep making promises, you keep making rules for your kids, don't do this, don't do that, but just before the kids eyes, you are the one who keeps violating your own rules!

You keep making promises, I'm going to diet, I wanna be thin, I will work hard at my office, I wanna raise, I wanna be a little chubbier cos I'm too thin, I'll find a decent job, cos I wanna be independent, I'm going overseas to study, I'm going to find myself an eligible bachelor, I'm going to go make a change for a clean government, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do that.

Yes, you said all that, but what do you do to make your wish come true?

Hey, we don't live in Cinderella land where some prince charming would come and save the day. No! In this real world, prince charming would come and create a new problem for us, not to solve our problems.

Just words in not enough. Its never enough.

You wanna get a job? Go find yourself some skills, try apply for jobs everywhere, don't be discourage because of entry level.
You wanna get skinny? Go search google to find a recommended healthy lifestyle, go shopping for veggies and fruit, enjoy your time with your friends/family and take a walk with them for your exercise.
You get chubbier? Sleep more, drink milk, get a new job.
You wanna have your ideal man? Get yourself socialized, find new people in different fields by joining a community with your share interest, get a course of your interest and you'll find new people and more option and choice.
You want your kids to obey the rule? Set an example and don't break the rules who you yourself made. If your kids break the rule, you'll yell at them like there's no tomorrow, but if you break the rule, you act like its just nothing. Do you know how annoying it is for the kids?!
You want to change the government to be a clean one? Don't just nagging about the stupid and corrupt government from the comfort of your own home and step outside and be an active watcher to the government.

There's so many things you can do to make it right. There's so many things you can do to make your wish come true.
But do you actually do it?

Words, my dear, is just not enough.Its never enough.

Enough is enough

2009-12-04T05:50:00.001+07:00

I got really tired last night, I decided to let go.

I'm a nice person, I really do. Just ask anyone around me and they'll say the same thing. I have to tell you that this is not narcisme nor self proclaiming but just to let you people know that I'm a nice person. Its hard for me to say 'no' even though I've been saying that all the time, its really difficult for me to witness bullying in progress, its really not appropriate for me to debate on useless things but in the end what we're debating have nothing to do with the issue. Its really annoying for me to see how these people doesn't consider me as a friend who needed respect for what I like and don't like.

So instead of an open war, I decided to just turn my back away and look the other way. I gave up.

Anyway, follow my twitter : www.twitter.com/rerechan =]

Have you ever feels..

2009-12-03T08:23:00.001+07:00

...Like you only want what is not there in front of your eyes? I mean, just this morning, my dad making me a delicious fried banana and I didn't eat it. Not that I don't want it, I mean I can smell the sweet scent of the mouth watering fried banana, but I didn't feel like eating. I know my dad would be disappointed every time I don't eat his cooking, I know I would if the person that I personally cook for don't eat my cooking.

Its just that... I don't want it. I don't feel like eating it. I feel like eating something that isn't there like bread or cereal not that warm, delicious, mouth watering fried banana! And it happens all the time! I always want something that isn't there! Usually when I skip delicious snacks in my house, I come looking for it when they're gone and finish. And again, this happens all the time!

I'm a little terrified if this thing would go on in my life in a different kind of subject. No longer food, but... Future spouse, perhaps? What if... I ignore this wonderful person in front of me, wanting for something more and isn't there, looking for some weakness and then come back and looking at him with a different perspective... Just right when he's already gone!

God, I feel so shitnetron...

Random stuff (meaning get out if ur not interested.re)

2009-12-01T19:56:00.001+07:00

Well hello there. Eid has come to an end (thank God, I can't munch another meat for another week!) And my blogger friends seems to be quite busy with their holiday (or is it exams) so even they didn't update their blog (blablabla excuses, excuses, excuses) but being randomly me, I'll update my blog now with unimportant updates.. =]

Ok, so I'm going 26 in 3 month and the questions of : when are u getting married? Soon will be a big hit. But what can I say? These people just don't know how to have fun. The hell with marriage, right now I have more important things to think about like, paying for my bb, paying for the plane ticket to Jogja, paying for gathnas and blazer, getting sponsors for my event, getting new shoes, handbag, and set of computers.

Damn why does it all involves money?! Gini nih yang udah gawe, pikirannya duit ke duit lagi.. Enaknya yang masih sekolah/kuliah cuma mikirin pe er ama ulangan.. (Dan dikejauhan terdengar: enaknya yang udah kerja ga usah mikirin peer ama ulangan, tinggal kerja trus dapet duit).

Haaaa... Manusia kapan ada puasnya sih?

Imo, justru struggling untuk mendapatkan apa yang kita mau itulah saat dimana kita paling merasa 'hidup'. Coba bayangin deh, seandainya kita bisa dapetin semua yang kita mau pada saat kita baru membayangkannya.. Tinggal tunggu mati aja itu mah, bosen amat idup kek gitu.

Just imagine.. A life full of emotion.. Or an emotionless life..

What do u prefer?

Random stuff (meaning get out if ur not interested.re)

2009-12-01T19:44:00.001+07:00

Whassup World?

2009-11-28T13:18:00.001+07:00

You know something? Sometimes i feel disconnected. I don't get what they're talking about but somehow i don't really want to know what they're talking about. I never think of myself as a diligent person, a good writer, a creative designer, etc. I am just someone who do it for fun, and somehow, tried to fit in at some point in the journey.

Oh, well. It was fun and all but i just don't have any interest about it anymore. Who would blame me? I know more than a few people who feel the same way as i am. But no biggy. I found a couple of great friends from it. I like em sooo much, i don't have a problem with their roaming conversation or weird behaviour and not so cut out with the way i think cos of the age gap and all. No problem at all. =]

Interview My RP Characters

2009-11-26T19:59:00.000+07:00

Rules
1) [s]Pick one of your FCs/OCs[/s]---CORET! Gue akan pilih tiga sekaligus!! >3
2) Fill in the questions/statements as if you were your FC/OC
3) Tag people at the end of the quiz
4) tag back people that tag you

I'll interview Lamanda Worthington (RIP) My Favorite chara. <3

1) What's your name?
Lamanda :3

2) Do you know why you were named that?
I don't know.

3) Are you single or taken?
Single.

4) Have any abilities or powers?
Lamanda collects eyeballs!

5) Stop being a Mary-sue.
My doll name is Marie, just Marie, not Mary-sue!

6) Uh...if you were to get in a fight with a strong wrestler, do you think you'd win?
Why would anyone wants to hurt Lamanda? *hiks*

7) Riiiight... Have any family members?
My Parents and... Frap!

8) Oh? How about pets?
Lamanda have a couple of baby scorpions at home. :3

9) Cool, I guess. Tell me something that you don't like.
Lamanda don't like scary people...

10) Something that you do like?
My doll... and Frap!

11) Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?
Lamanda like to play with Marie *points at the porcelain doll*

12) Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before?
Why would Lamanda hurt anyone? *shivers*

13) Ever... Killed anyone before?
*eyes getting bigger*

14) What kind of animal are you?
Lamanda want to be a doll!

15) Name your worst habits.
Lamanda don't have a bad habit at all!

16) Do you look up to anyone at all?
Frap!

17) Gay, straight, or bi?
What's a bi?

18) Do you go to school?
Lamanda want to stay home!

19) Ever wanna marry and have kids one day?
what's marriage?

20) Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?
Lamanda wants that candy!

21) What are you most afraid of?
Alone

22) What color is your hair?
Red.

23) Eyes?
Red. No, green! But Lamanda want red eyes!

24) What do you usually wear?
A dress.

25) What's your religion?
What?

26) Do you wish this quiz is over?
Yes. Lamanda want to play.

27) Well, it's still not over.
*yawn*

28) Anyways, where do you live?
Worthington palace.

29) What class are you? (Low class, middle class, high class)?
Ha?

30) How many friends do you have?
Frap!

31) If you could change anything about you, what would you change?
I want red eyes! And Frap!

33) What is your thoughts on pie?
Lamanda loves Pie!

34.) Alright. What's your favorite food?
Apple pie

35.) Favorite drink?
Sweet tea.

36.) What is your favorite place?
Near Frap.

37.) Least favorite?
Lamanda don't like scary people.

38.) Are you still wanting the quiz to end?
*nods*

Tagged from Sari. Oh, how much I miss Lamanda. =[

Goodbye

2009-11-26T18:17:00.001+07:00

Goodbye sunshine.
Goodbye clouds.
Goodbye moonlight.
Goodbye stars.
Goodbye sky.

I just got myself a blackberry.

Wish me NOT get hit by a bus!! =]

Thank God for Blackberry

2009-11-24T14:22:00.001+07:00

People these days doesn't look up, nor straight ahead. They look down to their Blackberry.

Gimme one.

Chocolate with dilema

2009-11-18T08:40:00.001+07:00

So yesterday as i was heading back home from work, my route was to hitch hike one of my co-workers car and then ride another car to get home. This car is a public transportation called 'angkot' *halah, apaan sih*. Well, yesterday, as i was waiting for the angkot to go and drive since the driver is waiting waaay to long for another passanger to come and filled the angkot, suddenly i was craving for some chocolate! Silverqueen's chunky bar, to be exact! It's yummy! And my cell had no pulsa (what the hell is the english for pulsa?!)!

So i get out of the angkot, get in to a mini market (it was raining) and get myself a nice small piece of silverqueen's chunkybar (i was broke!). And i also get some pulsa (?) for my cellphone.

Anyway, long story short, i get inside a new angkot cos the old one is still waiting for passangers, there was this pretty lady inside wearing a peach hijab and a long brown dress (i kinda forget what its called). We trade looks with each other for a second, thin smile, then back with our own business. There was just the two of us in the car. I want to eat my chocolate so i opened it and munch it right away. Its manner to offer the other person who is not eating to share the food that we're eating and i was constantly looking at her, waiting for my mouth to spit out the offer (for the food). But in my head, this words just keep repeating :

"i so wanna share this with her. People used to share me a lot of food in the bus. But i don't know her! And this is awkward! But i have to offer her the chocolate! What am i gonna do?!"

Of course right now in your head u'll all be saying : 'Just offer her the chocolate!'

But i didn't.

I still feel regretful cos i didn't offer her the chocolate, though. :(

Kimdonesia... :'(

2009-11-17T21:17:00.001+07:00

You see, there was this cute girl, about my little sister age, a caucasian muallaf aussie who love indonesia named kimdonesia. I kinda fall in love with her (don't freak out! I mean it in a good way!) when i first saw her hijabi tutorial video's on youtube. Her video was kinda dorky but fun to watch cos she look so excited! At that time, i was loosing bit by bit of my faith and wondering why i'm wearing a hijab at the first place.

Watching her get all excited about her hijab get me excited as well. I imidiately subscribe her youtube video, check out her blog and add her facebook & twitter (about 6 month later, not a big fan of facebooks and twitter). Her and that cute egyptian girl who got engaged and probably already married by now so she never update her video's again.

Back to kimdonesia. She was a former christian turning islam and very proud and happy about it. She's also a big fan of indonesia (explain the nick name) cos she stayed in lampung when her mother remarried an indonesian guy. A lot of people really inspired by her passion, her funny sarcastic kinda way jokes, her proudness of islam and the love of life that she showed in each and every video. A fan even made her a website. Www.kimdonesia.com. Don't really know if its still working or not cos i never visit that website. Last time i visit was still under construction.

The story goes, i discovered that she's going through a lot of emotional troubles in the past few days. Her beloved dog dies, she got rejected from the university she's going after, she probably was going through some faith issue cos one of her twitter says that she's trying to reach and consulting with another muallaf just like her. Last but not least, she stated in her facebook that she wanted to take off her hijab in indonesian language (probably scared by the bashing of her other english speaking facebook friends, but no use cos her indonesian speaking facebook friends bash her anyway in a 'lebay' kinda way).

Her facebook was suspended by her right away. I was concerning about her so i try to show my support by twitter. I realized that she must've going through a hard time but the people just constantly bashing her, judging her, threatening with hell fire and such.

This happens a few days ago. Today, i open my blog and Ange from www.3beeta.blogspot.com (probably the wrong address but i'm writing this on my cell, edited later) said that kimdonesia has officially left islam for personal reason. I was surprised! I thought the furthest kim would go would only to take off her hijab and try to start over. Well, she does try to start over but on a different religion, or no religion at all.

The reason why i'm writing this is to let kimmy know that i really really like her not only because she was a proud muallaf but also because of her dorkyness, her cute sense of humour, unique view of the world, her loving attitude and just for being.. Kim. Even if she wasn't islam i would've still like her, but that was the reason i know a person name Kimdonesia in the internet world.

Kim, ur a strong girl. I hope whatever ur problems are, u won't give up to this harsh world that easy. Good luck on ur new journey. I wish u all the best in life.

Another day, another me.

2009-11-17T20:06:00.001+07:00

I'll write this blog in english, thinking that most of my co-workers is lacking in english. Why? Coz i'm gonna talk about them, of course.

So the main topic of the day : my kind and smart boss. Kind cos he always know when i was short on money, he'll give me some even if its just 10k, and smart cos he knows what he's doing and know how to do it. I really admired my boss and have a very high respect towards him although, as a normal human being he's not perfect with a lot of fidelity case (which he shares his fidelity stories on many occasion).

I'm totally cool with that. I mean i have no intention on ruining his marriage by telling his wife about these stories, and its not my business anyway. That is, until, he finally set his eyes on me... I cannot believe my eyes! What the heck?! I thought he already know what kind of girl i am. I'm not one of the 'take out' girls that he usually date, and from working with him for the entire 4 years, he should've known!

Let me tell u something, my age maybe has reached the age of 25 but i am still pretty, good looking, smart enough to get any single, available, wife-less, childless, young, good looking, smart guy i want! I am not that desperate nor i am that poor to expect some money from him in any ways possible!

Oh, come on, dude! U have got to be kidding me!

Well, i am taking the adviced from my friends. Forget future good relationship! A no is a no!

2009-11-16T08:06:00.001+07:00

Jadi ceritanya begini, pada suatu hari yang membosankan, gw memutuskan untuk cabut ke warnet daripada nongkrong dirumah mantengin sinetron langganan nyokap. As I was sitting in front of the computer, I got even more bored than ever. Gw berpikir di dalam otak gw yang sesederhana spongebob, betapa 'lame'nya hidup gw, cuma berkutat diantara kantor, rumah dan warnet. Its clear that i need a better social life than this.

Maka ceritanya mulailah gw mengeluhkan hal ini diplurk. Temen2 gw dengan baik hatinya menyarankan banyak hal yang sebenarnya cukup logis (untuk kebanyakan orang) tapi satu persatu semua saran itu gw pentalin. Persis kek Mikan kalo lagi di kasih tau! Lol! Peace, ah, Mik. (smirk)

Oh, well, gw ceritanya masih ga sadar diri tuh ya, ampe ketika gw lagi ngecek facebook, ternyata Frap ngomelin gw, ngomong kalo gw kebanyakan alesan. If i really wanna do something, just go ahead and do it! No excuses! And he's right! (thanx bro *hugs*)

After awhile, i started thinking. Karena setelah gw komplain, ngeluh kek gitu, the truth is, weekends gw abisin nginep dirumah temen di Depok, bercanda, ketawa ketiwi, and much more. Jadi masalahnya bukan dari jumlah teman atau apakah gw punya atau ga punya teman untuk menghabiskan waktu, toh temen yang gw kenal di inet rata2 jadi temen deket gw di real life juga. Kalaupun gw pengen menghabiskan waktu ber-social life, daripada ngenet waktu itu mendingan gw ngobrol ama temen2 gw di telpon atau sms sambil ngegaring bareng wkwk.

So I reckon its all a matter of choice. I choose to socialized via internet coz i thought its cheaper (well, apparently not if ur a frequent warnet visitor =="). Sebagai net addict, gw merasa membutuhkan berkomunikasi dengan temen2 gw via inet, apalagi waktu itu koneksi im3 lagi kacrut. Tapi gw bosan dengan internet dan gw ga menyadarinya, gw cuma merasa 'lame' aja gt, gaulnya di internet mulu sementara yang gw butuhkan saat itu bukanlah random chat by writing but a face to face chat, a little skinship, a good laugh. I think not having any internet connection at this current time is a good thing, make me realize a few things that i'm missing. :]

Pilih!

2009-11-10T14:01:00.001+07:00

Kantor gw punya dua orang linmas (atau satpamlah istilahnya), si A dan si B. Dua-duanya cowok, dan menurut pandangan mata gw yang udah kerja bareng keduanya selama setahun lebih, emang cocok jadi satpam. Satpam di lingkungan PNS (catet!) karena satpam sekelas satpam bank mah selain berbodi gede tapi juga ramah dan pinter, kalo ada yang baru dateng ditanyain urusannya apa dan dianterin ke teller atau CS bersangkutan. Linmas kantor gw? Hmph. Boro-boro.

Nah, si A ini orang pendek, agak bau badan, tukang molor, lemot (!), tapi rajin dan humble. Mau disuruh-suruh biarpun beresiko kalo nyuruh-nyuruh dia karena ujung-ujungnya salah mulu. Sementara si B juga pendek, cungkring, senga, jarang mau disuruh-suruh, kerjaannya main games di kompi mulu tapi ngaku2 (?) pinter (?). Serius! Tadi beberapa menit yang lalu gw denger dia ngomong kek gitu ke salah satu orang kantor (si C)!

Gw pengen ngakak! Tapi berhubung orangnya masih ada jadi gw tahan-tahanlah ya. Pas orangnya dah ga keliatan, gw tanya dah ke si C, "Mending mana? Lemot tapi rajin atau pinter tapi males?" Jawabnya, "Mending yang rajin atuh! Yang males mah ga guna," (kurang lebih begitulah jawabannya)

Dan gw setuju! Masih mending si A daripada si B. Lagian gw selalu pengen ngakak sama orang-orang yang ngaku pinter.. Justru kebodohan mereka disitu tuh! Entah ya penilaian gw rada subjektif atau ga karna basicly gw emang ga suka aja ama si B. Senga banget! Disuruh ama gw ga pernah mau mentang2 gw masih honor. Pret!

Me? I'm just fine.

2009-11-09T21:15:00.000+07:00

So a little update, I'm planning on making a Workshop, a Writing Workshop. I got all figured out, just need to discuss some things with my members and coordinate the place and its all good. Let's just wish it all the best. In the mean while, I'm also planning on making some funding for my Workshop. Planning on making some Harry Potter's Butterbeer and Pumpkin Juice. Don't know if it'll taste good but I've collected all the recipe just need to actually make it. Wish me luck!

Anyway, gw menyesal ga masuk kantor hari ini. Berita buruk dateng bertubi-tubi non stop. Mulai dari berita kalau gw belom nyetak lampiran tunjangan kinerja yang menghasilkan tidak cairnya tunjangan kinerja hari ini, dapet sms dari si bos kalau PC Server yang biasa gw pake ternyata Innalillahi alias mati ga bisa idup, laptop masih di rumah sakit (tempat service). Satu-satunya hal bagus yang gw dapet hari ini adalah berhasil menghubungi pihak Musium Bank Mandiri buat pesen tempat dan dapet duit buat rapat juga berhasil tidur dan istirahat karena kaki gw sakit mampus gara-gara kemaren jalan keliling Plangi (Plaza Semanggi) setelah beli kado ultah Mida (yang kecepetan, btw). Gw jalan pake heels yang biasa gw pake ke kantor tapi tetep aja biarpun heelsnya rendah gw tetep ga biasa berhubung di kantor gw kebiasaan pake sendal jepit jadi itu sepatu biasanya nganggur aja gitu berdebu.

Lalu... Umm, gw pengen online ya dari tadi pagi, niat ke warnet buat menghabiskan waktu dan nyari2 resep Butterbeer dan Jus Labu buat jualan ntar tapi setelah dapet semuanya, yang tadinya niat ngerep dan ngecek update youtube sambil ngeblog jadi terganggu. Masalahnya gw bosen di warnet ini. Gw cepet capek klo di warnet. Masih mending kalau di rumah atau di kantor, bisa ditinggal-tinggal, kalau di warnet kan intens gitu. Mana gw juga nyalain YM lagi (biarpun impis) dan perasaan bosan itu bener-bener menjadi-jadi.

Besok banyak kerjaan, Anggaran 2010 harus di revisi, ngecek komputer kantor, ngeprint atau ngetik ulang lampiran tunjangan kinerja, minta supaya komputer dibenerin trus dipasangin simda... ah... setres gw ga ke kantor hari ini. Mana besok juga rapat untuk Workshop pula.. gimana nasib kalau PC-nya koit? Spidi cuma bisa nyambung ke satu komputer itu doank. --a

Racauan dan curhatan kosong ini has to stop right now! I'll update with a slightly better insight! *wave*

The Bad Guy Behind The Bad Guy

2009-11-08T15:15:00.000+07:00

Jadi kemarin gw nonton film ampe pagi. Maksud gw pagi bener2 ampe pagi subuh-subuh gitu. Ada banyak film bagus sih. XD Waktu itu gw sempet nonton film kek model G.I. Joe (yang menurut gw jelek tapi menurut Mikan dan Mida oke banget apalagi ada si Channing Tatum--whoever he is) dan model film yang ada hero and the villain. Nah, the villain ini biasanya punya organisasi atau apalah itu namanya dimana ada banyak orang yang bekerja buat dia dari balik komputer atau pegang senjata, siap untuk diserang dan dibom serta dibunuh tanpa ampun oleh 'the hero'. I was watching some other movie when suddenly I'm starting to think about G.I. Joe (anehnya, film itu tuh America's Sweetheart).

Oke, gw kepikiran tentang Film G.I. Joe kan tuh, dimana sang villain punya banyak banget anak buah yang pinter, jago fighting, hidup di dunia bawah air, siap bunuh orang kapan aja si bos nyuruh. Dan di belakang otak gw yang berpikir seadanya itu gw berpikir : anak buahnya villain yang terkenal ini dibayar berapa buat bunuh orang? Buat tinggal di sebuah kota bawah air kerja 24/7 non stop tanpa keluarga padahal tampangnya masih muda-muda gitu? Mereka dibayar berapa? Mereka dikasih keyakinan apa sama si villain ini kalau misalnya rencana jahatnya sukses? Bahwa mereka juga bakalan ikut sukses? Jadi bodyguard eksklusif?

Orang-orang yang kerja pada si villain dalam level rendah (yang pegang senjata, yang pegang komputer) ini bakalan dapet apa? Gajinya berapa? Kok mau-maunya bunuh orang tanpa alasan? Kok mau-maunya jaga sebuah gua di tengah-tengah benua antartika yang kosong dan beku? Kok mau-maunya tinggal di sebuah kota bawah laut di tengah-tengah benua antartika tanpa ada kontak sama keluarga--or further more, to make a family? I mean, what do they get, for helping the villain? To be doing the crap stuff? Untuk berdiri doank jaga pintu keluar masuk pegang pistol untuk kemudian ditembakin sama 'the hero'?

What is it with them?

This is called "Arogansi"

2009-11-06T12:37:00.000+07:00

I just simply cannot believe this guy. Apa sih yang dia banggain jadi polisi? Nyuap masuk sampe berpuluh-puluh juta. Begitu masuk, harus punya koneksi kuat biar ga ditempatin di daerah dan cepet naik pangkat. Biar ga rugi bandar, tilang secara resmi ga berlaku, suka cari-cari masalah biar uang tilang dan administrasi lainnya bisa ditilep dan dibagi-bagi. Lo kira gw ga tau semua ini? Hey, dude... Se-Indonesia juga tau!

Arogansi seperti ini... gw pikir 70-80% petugas polisi punya biarpun beberapa ga menonjolkan hal itu. Just to let you guys know, gw pikir kita-kita sebagai masyarakat sipil yang harus dilayani oleh pelayan masyarakat yang disebut sebagai polisi ini harus berdiri tegak. Jangan takut sama polisi kalau emang ga salah apa-apa. Belajar basic law supaya jangan ditipu sama polisi. Pakai rasionalitas kalau bicara sama mereka supaya jangan dibodoh-bodohi, jangan kalah ngomong sama mereka dan satu lagi : jangan mau bayar uang apapun ke polisi kalau emang ga masuk prosedur resmi.

Intinya : jangan mau direndahin, ditipu, dibodoh-bodohin sama polisi mentang-mentang mereka punya pistol, sel penjara dan semua bla-bla-bla lainnya. Ingat posisi mereka yang adalah pelayan masyarakat (yaitu anda dan saya). Kalau mereka mulai arogan dengan sikap berlebihan dan tidak sesuai prosedur, LAPORIN! Kekuatan media massa jaman sekarang ada di sisi kita, masyarakat sipil, bukan mereka! MERDEKA! (lho?)

Recommended Drama

2009-11-02T21:18:00.002+07:00

So I'm following a couple of Korean Drama right now. Why Korean Drama? Coz it's fun, funny, full of ideas, interesting, nice clothing, cute cast, amazing camera angle, and the music is fantastic. Overall, it just fit my style of drama. Kunci dari drama-drama yang gw ikutin ini adalah episode pertama yang breathtaking! I really mean it! Setelah episode pertama, klo menurut gw ga menarik, selanjut-selanjutnya ga bakalan gw tonton lagi. Tapi kalau episode pertama aja udah sampe sesek nafas nontonnya, gw ga bakalan lepasin itu drama sampai selesai! Lebih oke lagi kalau semua episodenya udah selesai tayang jadi tinggal donlot aja sampai selesai trus ditonton sekaligus hehe. Tapi sayangnya beberapa drama yang gw ikutin saat ini masih tayang di Korea sana, jadi mesti sabar-sabar menunggu subnya. Salut dah buat para fansubber drama Korea! Klo gw punya duit gw kasih donasi deh!

Oh, well. Ada beberapa K-Drama yang sangat gw highly recommended (not in particular order) :

1. Shining Inheritance.

Ceritanya menurut gw cukup standar, cinta segitiga, anak orang kaya yang bandel, kaya mendadak miskin lalu mendadak kaya, ibu tiri yang kejam, bla bla bla. Tapi ada sesuatu yang menonjol di drama ini. Sesuatu itu ga cuma satu tapi banyak! Satu yang paling gw suka dari drama ini adalah values-nya.

Bagaimana seorang nenek yang mengingat masa lalunya yang kelam menampung dan menyangi para pekerjanya yang single parents dan sulit mendapat kerja karena berbagai alasan, bagaimana perjuangan si pemeran utama wanita yang melewati berbagai kesulitan tapi selalu bekerja keras tidak pernah mengharap lebih, tetap realistis tapi juga tidak pernah menadahkan tangan, bagaimana seorang cucu yang keras kepala masih bisa menghormati neneknya yang seorang kepala keluarga, berjuang mendapatkan pengakuannya, bagaimana seorang laki-laki bisa menyerahkan cintanya dengan elegan (Oppa~ Aku masih tak rela!!), bagaimana kasih sayang seorang kakak terhadap adiknya yang autis (beneran sakit autis) dan lain sebagainya. Bener-bener full of values dari drama 28 episode ini.

Untuk episode pertamanya? Breathtaking. Just absolutely breathtaking. You have to check it out.

2. Queen Seon Deok.

Drama historical (yang tidak terlalu historical--karena gw keseringan nonton film historical Cina yang tiada duanya dalam hal detail) ini, mengisahkan tentang kutukan putri kembar dan seorang Selir kejam nan jenius dan ambisius bernama Mishil. Terus terang aja gw cukup surprise pas nonton ini. Klo biasanya tokoh protagonis adalah tokoh yang paling keren dalam sebuah dorama, kali ini justru kebalikannya. Sejak episode pertama, gw udah terpesona sama tokoh antagonisnya, justru... Mishil. She's like the ultimate villain! Gila, gerak geriknya, bibirnya yang jarang senyum, gerakannya yang terjaga, auranya... pokoknya jahat banget! Tapi masih anggun.

Malah kalau diperhatiin waktu tayang diantara pemeran utama protagonisnya yaitu Deokman dan Mishil yang jelas-jelas antagonis, waktu tayangnya lebih banyak Mishil. Pemeran utamanya sendiri baru keluar setelah 4-6 episode berlangsung (kalau ga salah) dan gw jatuh cinta sama pemeran Deokman cilik. Sumpah dia keren mampus tu aktris cilik! Kalau ada satu yang gw cinta banget dalam drama Korea, itu pasti akting para castnya. Mantap! Chaego! (The best!.red)

Episode pertamanya? Kalau ga sampe 'captivated' by Mishil... I really have no idea what your senses are.

3. You're Beautiful

I have to admit, saat pertama kali liat poster promosi drama ini, pikiran gw pasti sama dengan pikiran kalian semua : apaan sih? Buset lebai amat! Tapi karena didorong rasa iseng melihat ratingnya yang lumayan tinggi, gw jadi penasaran trus donlot episode pertamanya. Harap diingat gw baru donlot dan nonton episode pertamanya doank. Gw penasaran mampus sama episode keduanya tapi berdasarkan pengalaman gw, justru lebih seru kalau dalam sehari cuma nonton beberapa drama secara random dan hanya satu episode per hari (selain karena memang speed donlot gw ga dewa-dewa amat).

I thought it would be cheesy (norak.red) dan ga bagus, standar, dst. Tapi setelah gw nonton episode pertamanya ternyata... kocaaaaaaaaaakkkk!!!! Ampun dah kocak dan refreshing! Apalagi angle-angle kamera sama efek-efeknya yang biarpun sederhana tapi 'nendang' banget. Kalau kata Pain (temen plurk) mah, drama ini kombinasi dari Coffee Prince sama BOF and I cannot say anything that is more precise than that. Totally! Kalau kalian termasuk penggemar drama dengan genre seperti itu, this is the drama for you.

Dilanjut lagi nanti kalau sedang mood. =]

sleepy head

2009-11-02T13:52:00.003+07:00

i admit my stupidity. i shouldn't have slept at 2 AM this morning when i knew its monday, its payday, its gonna be a busy day. right now my head is so heavy and i really need to rest my eyes for AT LEAST 10 minute.

i met this nice old lady at the bus this morning. i mean, she was nice and everything and she's even working in the same workfield as i do, meaning we both wear the same uniform. but the problem is : she would talk non stop! ignoring the fact that i was yawning for every 5 minute. to make things a little more burdensome, she told me to sleep if i was sleepy. my manners told me to keep my eyes wide open. i really have no idea why cubung like to have the stranger conversations on the bus/train with (of course) strangers cos i'd rather sleep or listen to some music or the voices inside my head, chatting with myself (i don't think i'm crazy, yet).

well, anyway, while chatting with the nice old lady, my mind was wandering everywhere (unpolite, i know) and suddenly i have this urge to buy a house. i haven't talk to my sist and parents about this but i'm sure they'll all agree on me. we need another house.

i'm thinking bogor. =]

Netizens

2009-10-29T07:23:00.002+07:00

Netizens, gw denger istilah ini cukup sering akhir-akhir ini. Terutama setelah gw mulai aktif dengan hal-hal yang berbau Korean Entertainment. Pucaknya adalah ketika seorang artis kelahiran Amerika yang terusir dari Korea karena amukan para netizens.

Exactly what is netizen? Berdasarkan Wikipedia, hasil inilah yang keluar :

A Netizen (a portmanteau of Internet and citizen) or cybercitizen is a person actively involved in online communities.
neitzan can use the Internet to engage in activities of extended social groups, such as giving and receiving viewpoints, furnishing information, fostering the Internet as an intellectual and a social resource, and making choices for the self-assembled communities. Generally, a netizen can be any user of the worldwide, unstructured forums of the Internet. The word netizen itself was coined by Michael Hauben.^[1]^[2]

Generally, Netizens are Internet users who utilize the networks from their home, workplace, or school (among other places). Netizens try to be conducive to the Internet's use and growth. Netizens, who use and know about the network of networks, usually have a self-imposed responsibility to make certain that it is improved in its development while encouraging free speech and open access.

Okeh, kalau menurut artian dari sudut pandang gw yang bahasa Inggrisnya terbatas, di artian wikipedia itu arti dari netizen adalah penduduk dunia maya yang terlibat aktif dalam komunitas online. Mereka menggunakan internet untuk melakukan aktifitas dalam kelompok sosial, seperti memberi dan menerima pendapat, menyebarkan informasi, dst. Secara umum, seorang netizen bisa jadi siapapun di dunia ini, forum-forum yang tidak terstruktur di Internet. Netizens adalah pengguna internet yang memanfaatkan jaringan dari rumah, kantor atau sekolah (selain dari tempat-tempat lain).

Sisanya, gw rasa kalian bisa baca sendiri. Simple English would do you justice. (smirk)

Anyway, Kalau dilihat dari arti netizen sendiri, doesn't it remind you of someone? Like, yourself, for instance. Gw mengakui kalau gw adalah netizen dalam artian pengguna internet aktif, penduduk anonim di dunia maya, menggunakan blog ini untuk menyebarkan informasi dan mengungkapkan pendapat gw tentang apa pun, siapa pun dan kapan pun. Alasan kenapa gw sering lost kalau temen-temen gw dah mulai menggunakan term netizen adalah karena mereka mengungkapkan term ini sebagai pihak ketiga. Like it's just someone we don't know from a far far away land. Hey, you and I are netizens too! Internet tidak terbatas ruang dan waktu, penduduknya semakin bertambah bahkan tanpa melihat jumlah penduduk dunia karena setiap individu bisa membuat akun anonim sampai 10 buah (yang berbeda-beda) sekaligus dan semuanya aktif di forum masing-masing.

Netizen mendapat perhatian di setiap negara maju dan berkembang, terutama berkembang dalam hal kesadaran free speech (kebebasan berbicara) dan jaringan internetnya sendiri sudah tersebar luas dan tersosialisasikan dengan baik. Kadar perhatiannya tergantung dari kesadaran masing-masing, of course. Banyak kok yang gw lihat mengungkapkan pendapatnya tentang politik, entertainment, agama, dan lain lain dalam bentuk racauan di video youtube atau blogs dan forum yang tersebar dimana-mana. Tapi, yang akan gw sorot sekarang ini adalah para netizens Korea.

A plurk friend, shared a link, telling theory's of to why Korean's Netizens could be so mean, that they could even encourage a person (this actually happen--a lot) to commit suicide, ending someone's career, throwing an upcoming artist to get out of Korea, or even... creating a wave of fans for a group of boyband/girlband/artist from all over the world (I'm talking a positive impact of this). The article telling us that the reason why Korean people are a harsh netizens is because of their unhappy childhood where opinions and free speech is blocked from so many direction. I'm sure the generation before me feels the extreme of this condition, but on the other hand, I feel that the future generation would feel a little bit more freedom in terms of free speech. Hey, sekarang udah jaman apa?

Tapi, in my honest opinion, gw merasa bahwa para netizen Korea, menjadi orang-orang yang mengagungkan kebebasan berpendapat di internet dan ternyata, pendapat mereka sangat berarti, pendapat mereka didengar, penting, urgent, membuat dampak nyata! Netizens dengan akun anonim mereka tiba-tiba menjadi penting! Poll di internet ditayangkan dan diberitakan di media elektronik, hell yeah, berita menyimpang di internet bahkan bisa menghancurkan hidup dan karir seseorang di dunia nyata.

Dari sisi si artis/politikus/tokoh publik yang sedang naik dan butuh feedback tentang seberapa populer mereka, bisa mendapatkannya dari internet. Mereka bisa melihat pendapat publik tentang akting/musik mereka, image mereka secara keseluruhan, interaksi langsung dengan penggemar tanpa jadi gepeng atau biru2 karena dicubitin, memberikan entertainment langsung seperti musisi IU yang memasang video dirinya yang bermain lagu-lagu barat secara akustik live di webpage resminya, dan tentu saja, mempromosikan hasil karyanya seperti lagu atau akting, dan lain sebagainya.

Freedom of speech di internet knows no boundaries, tidak ada pembatas. Semua orang bebas berbicara dari segala umur, jenis kelamin, pekerjaan, di segala tempat di dunia. Masalah terjadi ketika para netizen ini mulai menganggap bahwa orang yang mereka kritik itu adalah mesin tak berhati alias komputer lagi. Kadang ini suka terjadi dan terus terang gw juga suka mengalami hal ini ketika awal-awal gw kenal internet. Kadang gw suka ga sadar kalau orang yang gw ajak bicara di sisi lain internet ini, adalah sesama manusia yang punya perasaan, bukannya komputer yang ada di depan hidung gw.

Komentar-komentar tidak bertanggungjawab yang ditinggalkan para anti-fans, bisa membuat para artis tertekan, bahkan beberapa sampai bunuh diri saking stressnya (meskipun gw menyalahkan pada lemahnya mental mereka karena toh, itu kan cuma dunia maya, kalaupun impactnya sampai ke dunia nyata, harusnya masih bisa diselesaikan secara baik-baik karena, imo, ga ada masalah yang ga bisa diselesaikan). Para netizen yang melontarkan komentar super kejam ini pun biasanya cuma para pelajar yang bosan atau para pekerja yang kurang kerjaan dan biasanya ga punya personal life makanya ribet banget gangguin personal life orang lain (IMO).

Oh, well, anyway, this is my opinion on netizens. Sekian dan terima kasih. :)

Facebook

2009-10-26T19:54:00.002+07:00

It's like THE question.

Terus terang aja gw bukan pengguna aktif Facebook. Buat gw facebook agak membosankan biarpun praktis untuk menyebarkan berita dan bernarsis-narsis ria saling menge-tag foto dan keep contact sama temen lama. Berhubung gw lebih aktif di plurk dan gw kurang suka main games di facebook makanya gw ga gitu peduli sama akun facebook gw, kecuali ketika orang kantor gw mulai ngeledekin status facebook gw, sih. --a

For general reasons, I LOVE FACEBOOK! Why? Because... berkat iklan facebook yang gencar di tipi (sebenernya itu facebook cuma numpang beken lewat iklan hape dan operator hape), sampe akhirnya ada semacam stigma di antara kalangan 'tua' bahwa 'ngenet=facebook-an' dan 'ga gaul klo ga punya facebook' segala macem, maka penggunaan internet pun semakin meluas. Seiring dengan harga laptop yang semakin murah, internet yang semakin accessible, hot spot gratisan dimana-mana (disekolahan, kampus, kantor, mall, coffeeshop sampe dunkin donut dan bentar lagi McD--mungkin), pilihan ISP yang jauh lebih terjangkau, IMO, semuanya berkat facebook. Tepatnya, berkat facebook yang telah menyadarkan kaum 'tua' tentang betapa pentingnya koneksi internet itu.

Selama ini internet identik dengan kaum 'muda', dimana mereka menggunakan internet untuk main game online, friendster-an, mirc-an, kaskus-an, chatting di YM, cari tugas sekolah/kampus, sementara para kaum 'tua' hanya menonton di samping, mikir kalo internet itu hanya untuk kaum 'muda' dan rada ga penting juga bagi mereka untuk menguasai internet atau menikmati penggunaan internet di rumah atau memaksimalkan penggunaan hape masing-masing yang memang udah canggih sampai bisa dipakai internetan. TAPI, berkat facebook yang 'reconnecting people', para kaum 'tua' seperti menemukan kesenangan baru, tersendiri di internet. Mereka ketemu dan reunian dengan teman-teman masa lalu, saling berhubungan intens dengan saudara yang berada di pulau/benua lain, bermain games di applikasi facebook yang beragam, sharing foto bersama teman dan saudara, tepatnya, they (kaum tua) feel what we (kaum muda) feels.

Berkat facebook, para 'kaum tua' semakin terbiasa dengan internet, memudahkan 'kaum muda' dalam menggunakan internet karena tersosialisasikannya dengan baik penggunaan internet, maka gw merasakan internet (paling ga di kota-kota besar) sudah menjadi salah satu fasilitas esensial seperti pentingnya komputer di rumah. Ada komputer keknya ga afdol klo ga ada internet, minimal ada opera mini di hape biar apdet facebook-lah minimal.

Tapi yah, setiap ada efek positif, selalu ada efek negatif. Untuk saat ini efek negatif ini ga terlalu terasa tapi cukup 'mengena' di kalangan 'kaum muda'. Mereka jadi berantem sama bonyoknya tentang siapa yang pake komputernya duluan karena yang muda pengen main, yang tua pengen facebook-an. LOL!

I just started smoking

2009-10-21T08:46:00.001+07:00

No, not really. I just found that this cigarette package is quite cute. XD

yet another mistake

2009-10-14T13:10:00.000+07:00

So yeah... I just made a huge mistake that I really regret in my work. I mean, I do really regret it and the part that make me regret it the most is cos I don't get yelled at because of it. My boss[es] doesn't give me a hard time because of it.

Jadi awalnya saya harus mendata anggaran awal tahun di simda, tapi dikarenakan kemalasan saya, anggaran yang selalu berubah, waktu yang udah mepet, banyaknya data yang harus dientri, saya menyatakan diri ga sanggup dan akhirnya anggaran kantor saya dibuat secara manual biarpun dari pihak yang berwenang sudah menyatakan bahwa mereka mengharapkan anggaran tahun ini dikeluarkan dari simda, dan itu termasuk hardcopynya bukan cuma softcopynya. Karena keculunan saya, saya menganggap bahwa hard copy kurang diperlukan hingga membuat saya mengentri data anggaran dengan seadanya alias asal-asalan.

Dan sekarang.. yea, I regret it very much. Saat perubahan anggaran menuntut anggaran keluaran simda sementara anggaran yang nemplok di simda itu keliatan banget dibuat asal-asalannya. Di situasi seperti ini, normalnya seorang atasan akan memarahi bawahannya yang pemalas karena kerja kok asal-asalan, tapi berhubung di pemda kesalahan seperti ini seperti [terlalu] sering terjadi, atasan saya tidak memarahi saya, melainkan memutuskan untuk menyuruh saya mengerjakan hardcopy hasil kerja asal-asalan saya supaya bisa dilihat dengan 'pihak yang berwenang yang nantinya cuma akan berdecak dan mengerutkan kening' hari senin nanti karena saya dah bilang mau pulang hari ini yang notabene hari rabu dan audisi perubahan anggaran sedang dilaksanakan hari ini.

Why do I regret it very much? Cos no one yelled at me, that's why. I don't know why but my boss[es] doesn't yell at me when I do mistakes, they think that the shame from doing those mistakes is enough to punish my conscious, which they are right. If I got yelled at, I wouldn't feel this guilty to tell you the truth. I never took my mistakes lightly. It's all my mistakes and I really regret it. I'd do anything to fix this, including delaying my departure home. But, my generous boss said that I can leave home today and made the hard copy at monday. It's really something....

Espscially cos I know that my boss is not on a business trip today.

arts and students

2009-10-12T16:45:00.000+07:00

New day, new entry. Sebenarnya gw males isi blog tapi klo lagi weekend di rumah ga ada kerjaan bawaannya pengen ngenet aja makanya gw bikin entri blog ini di rumah pas weekend biarpun post entri ini di hari senin setelah gw ketemu dengan net kantor. =D

Oh, well, siang ini saat gw sedang menonton acara tipi (insert di transtv) yang menampilkan artis dan tatto, Giring Nidji stated that, "[...] tatto kan seni ya, namanya juga seniman [...]" And then it hit me. Gw keingetan tiba-tiba dengan anak-anak IKJ, mahasiswa jurusan seni yang merasa 'wajib' untuk memanjangkan rambut, digimbal, di-tatto, kuku kelingking (atau semuanya sekalian) dipanjangin sampe melengkung, jenggotan, kutuan, dsb. Itu semua katanya karena mereka 'seniman'. Yea, right.

Apa coba hubungannya antara seni dan rambut gimbal ga pernah dicuci? Apa coba hubungannya seni dengan kumis jenggot panjang berantakan sama muka kucel kek ga pernah mandi dan cukuran seumur-umur? 'Mengekspresikan diri' katanya? Atau cuma rebellation dari peraturan nyokap yang mengukung di rumah yang ngebawel suruh potong rambut, gunting kuku dan cukur jenggot? Ha! Very funny.

Jika anda adalah seorang mahasiswa seni jurusan seni rupa yang memfokuskan diri pada pembuatan patung atau lukisan, i don't think your beird would do you any good except if you want to use your long beird as a paint brush for your paintings. Jika anda mahasiswa seni musik, i don't think your unwashed face would do you any good in dancing, singing or creating music except the uneasy feeling of itchyness all over your body and that awefull oily face too.

Orang mempresentasikan diri dengan cara yang berbeda-beda. Jika mahasiswa seni memilih untuk mengekspresikan diri dengan cara memanjangkan rambut, menumbuhkan jenggot dan kumis (serta bulu ketek) liar, tampil kucel and the kumel dengan baju gombrong robek-robek, itu mah terserah aja tapi jangan mengatasnamakan 'pengekspresian seniman'. Kenapa? Karena seniman itu adalah orang yang mendalami seni. Seni sendiri ga ada hubungannya sama sekali dengan 'jorok'. Aduh plis deh. Coba liat dunk seniman asli yang ada di Eropa, Amerika atau negara Asia lainnya, mereka semua pake baju rapi, rambut kalaupun gondrong tapi masih rapi dan in reality, setelah anda lulus dari jurusan seni itu... dunia kerja menuntut anda untuk 'merapikan' diri. Bahkan dunia advertising dan broadcasting yang rata-rata membebaskan para pekerjanya untuk tetep gondrong dengan kumis dan jenggot pun tetep aja memberlakukan rules 'bebas, rapi'. Siapa yang mau kerja sama orang yang kucel and the kumel lagian?

Gw sebenernya menanti-nantikan adanya orang yang tampil di depan gw dengan pakaian yang rapi, rambut pendek, kuku pendek normal, ga wangi juga ga apa-apa tapi mengatakan kalau dirinya adalah mahasiswa seni dengan pembawaan diri yang pede. It just would seem... different than the 'normal image' of an art student.

Gw bukan mahasiswa seni, gw bahkan ga gitu ngerti tentang what is so called 'art' by some people. But i do know 1 thing : being an artist doesn't necessarily means having tattoo, ripped clothing, unwashed long hair, dirty long curvy nails, and oily faces. Being an artist student doesn't always mean to look like a poor market preman. LOL.

Current Mood

2009-10-07T22:50:00.002+07:00

Mood: Datar. Bosan.

NW: Pengen bikin chara baru dan update lagi sama IH. Kebetulan selain itu gw juga lagi getol donlot variety showsnya SuJu dan idol-idol Korea lainnya di youtube, IDWS, LJ, pokoknya dimana aja deh... Sebenernya bukan apa-apa tapi pada dasarnya gw demen variety show Korea tapi yang biasanya akan di sub bahasa Inggris cuma acara yang ada idol mereka doank wkwk. XD Oh, dan beberapa drama Korea, Jepang dan Amrik. Biasanya sebelum tidur gw siapin 4-6 donlotan drama untuk disimpen dan ditonton pas weekend nganggur ga ada inet di rumah. Oh ya.. tagihan Halo gw bengkak lagi bulan ini.. Such a surprise. Ha!

RW: Harusnya kerja, tapi males (ketularan si Bos) dan yang paling penting lagi... I WANT MY MONEY!!

Wish:
1. Dapet duit buat bayar flash sekitar bulan ini atau bulan depan.
2. Dapet duit buat bayar utang ke adek gw.
3. Dapet duit buat beli hape yang udah lama tertunda.
4. Cepet diangkat PNS secara resmi (karena gw butuh duitnya nih).
5. Cepetan cair duitnya!!!
6. Ngumpul sama Ayu n genk sambil nonton dorama lagi dan ngegosip. -_-

Song: La Cha Ta - F(x) *I can't get it out of my head!*

Some thoughts

2009-10-06T23:38:00.002+07:00

Jadi mari kita mulai dengan chronicles-nya. Awalnya gw sedang bersiap-siap akan tidur ketika. seperti biasa, gw mulai berlama-lama mengundur waktu tidur (seperti biasa juga) dengan cara membuka-buka plurk dan blogger dari hape. Ketika melihat beberapa temen blogger gw udah mengupdate blognya gw jadi excited kan tuh? Pas gw baca blognya gw jadi ter-trigger untuk membuat blog juga. Jadilah gw yang sekarang sudah akan siap-siap tidur pukul 23.40 WIB malah menyalakan kembali laptop untuk membuat entry geje ini.

So what I was meaning to pour in this blog is about 'alay'. Topik yang udah ngalur ngidul geje di plurk sejak entah kapan. So this 'alay' thingie... Everyone has their own opinion about it. Secara literally atau harfiah, 'alay' oleh sebagian orang dianggap seperti rumput alay-alay atau rumput liar... (jangan tanya artinya darimana karena ini cuma tiba-tiba kepikiran aja di otak gw alias ga ada sumber relevan) dimana oleh sebagian (besar) publik dianggap sebagai istilah yang paling pas untuk menyebut orang-orang sebagai kampungan atau norak atau ga up to date. Bener ga? Bener ga? Oh, well... Ini cuma pendapat gw aja sih.

Untuk bahasan yang paling merujuk orang kepada penggunaan kata 'alay' biasanya ditujukan pada orang-orang yang menulis dengan menggunakan sticky caps alias huruf yang kapital digabung dengan huruf biasa dan nomor untuk membentuk satu kata atau satu kalimat. Biasa menyebar di status jaringan sosial internet seperti facebook, plurk, friendster, dst dan ga jarang bikin orang langsung sensi karena ga ngerti itu tulisan ajaibnya ampun-ampunan.

Itu untuk akhir-akhir ini lho, tapi ga jarang orang merujuk kata 'alay' untuk orang-orang yang gayanya ga mainstream (atau justru terlalu mainstream, sesuai selera masing-masing), pake baju terlalu 'dangdut' misalnya atau emang pembawaannya rada hiperaktif atau rada gaptek atau penggemar musik slow Indonesia kek (ST12 yang lagi booming itu) atau... yah, macem-macem sih, tapi rata-rata kek gitu. Which in my honest opinion is : who are you to judge someone is 'norak', 'kampungan', atau istilah jaman sekarangnya : 'alay'?

Mari kita bahas sedikit tentang kategori alay ini :

1. Penggunaan sticky caps (istilah yang gw langsung familiar setelah join HPI *meskipun dah ga aktif lagi sekarang*)

Okelah, emang sih tulisannya sama sekali ga bisa kebaca tapi terus terang aja, ini tren bukan barang baru. Dari sejak gw masih SMA/SMP gaya tulis sticky caps ini udah beredar dan menurut pendapat sebagian (besar) orang, gaya tulis kek gini tuh lucu, imut, ga biasa, kreatif, dst. Apalagi menurut pendapat temen-temen gw yang rata-rata emang masih pada sekolah, ABG, pengen nunjukin kekreatifan masing-masing. Sejujurnya waktu pertama kali gw punya hape gw pengen bisa nulis kek sticky caps gitu karena emang trennya waktu itu kek gitu. Ga ada yang ngomong klo itu tuh 'alay' atau yang macem-macem kek gitu karena emang itu cuma beredar diantara kita-kita aja yang emang masih teenagers. Percobaan pertama gw adalah mencoba menamai temen-temen gw di phonebook hape pake gaya sticky caps... baru di 2 orang pertama gw langsung gagal. Ide gw abis. Mentok. Nama-nama yang ada di hape gw semuanya normal. Terus terang aja waktu itu gw justru ngerasa 'norak' lho karena ga bisa ikut-ikutan temen gw yang rata-rata gayanya kreatif abis bisa nulis sticky caps kek gitu. Rasanya otak gw ga nyampe buat ikutan sticky caps... LOL.

Well, my point is... rata-rata yang membuat sticky caps ini adalah para ABG atau yang ngerasa masih berjiwa ABG dan menyebar di kalangan mereka yang nyaman dengan sticky caps ini. Kalau ga ngerti, yaudah cuekin aja tulisannya. Buat apa lo semua koar-koar "alay, alay" sementara lo sendiri belum tentu tulisannya udah EYD.

2. Pakaian atau gaya yang sedikit 'ngotot' dalam lifestyle (maksudnya baju atau apa pun itu yang ikutan mainstream atau justru ga ikutan mainstream sama sekali).

In my honest opinion, it's all just a matter of taste. Kalau lo emang ga suka sama style pakaiannya seseorang atau selera musiknya, yang katanya sok barat-lah, sok melayu-lah, sok jepang-lah, sok korea-lah, sok hip hop, sok dangdut... sama sekali ga ada abisnya. Karena itu semua balik lagi ke selera masing-masing. Kalau temen lo emang suka sama lagu ST12, ngapain lo jadi sensi? Nyaris 75% penduduk Indonesia suka sama lagu-lagunya ST12 atau kangen band, buktinya album mereka laku keras baik yang resmi maupun ga resmi (alias bajakan). Don't judge people by their looks. Tampang mereka emang bukan model blasteran super ganteng tapi apa itu berarti lo tiba-tiba jadi 'sok kota' dengan mengatakan bahwa mereka band 'alay'? Masalah pakaian juga, just because some people have different taste, doesn't make them 'less' than you. Mungkin karena mereka emang ga bisa memadupadankan warna, bentuk jahitan baju dengan potongan badan, atau mungkin karena korban fashion, pengen gaya tapi seadanya. Apapun alasannya, hanya karena orang ga cocok seleranya dengan LO, doesn't make them any less than YOU!

3. Ini bikin gw kasian sekaligus sensi. Tentang kegaptekan beberapa orang lantas mereka dicap 'alay' oleh mereka yang udah ngerti atau emang kehidupan sehari-harinya berkutat di sekitar internet atau emang hobinya make gadget. Kenapa kasian? Soalnya mereka-mereka ini yang baru-baru ini belajar internet, rame-rame bikin facebook, tiba-tiba nabung buat beli gadget yang fungsinya aja ga tau tapi karena temen-temennya pada rame ngomongin tiba-tiba jadi pengen... mereka-mereka ini bukannya 'norak' (for some people to say it) tapi mereka ingin bisa. Ingin belajar, ingin bisa ngobrolin hal-hal yang sama kek temen-temennya yang lain. Kalaupun mereka ga pengen ya... berarti mereka emang ga tertarik aja. What I'm trying to say here is... just cos they are in the process of learning, doesn't give you the right to underestimate them. Just give them some time to learn the basics and they'll surprisingly (probably) going to turned out to be better than you. Dan kenapa gw sensi : yah, karena pada dasarnya gw ga punya kesabaran untuk ngajarin orang-orang tentang apapun. LOL.

So the bottom line is... just because some people have different interest than you, doesn't give you any RIGHT to judge, underestimate, or even to say... that they are 'alay'.

Sekian dan terima kasih. :)

50 Universal Truths About Men

2009-10-02T23:13:00.000+07:00

1. Why should I remind you that “I love you?” I already told you once.

2. I’ll do anything for sex; even commit to you for life.

3. I hate arguing with you. I’d much rather find a compromise.

4. I love long hair. Sorry, but I do.

5. When you speak softly, I can’t help but listen.

6. I need to be told “no” sometimes. Not a lot, but every now and again reminds me that you are expensive.

7. Please don’t ask me how you look unless you’re willing to trust my answer.

8. My eyes notice other women a lot more when you are upset with me.

9. When you’re happy with me I can’t help but want to please you.

10. If I don’t feel I can make you happy, it makes me feel less than a man.

11. I expect you to be ready when I pick you up.

12. Cigarettes make any woman look cheap and easy.

13. I'm scared if I let a woman inside my heart, she'll take advantage of me.

14. If you can’t stand up to me when I’m a brat, you’re too weak for me to open up to when I’m upset.

15. Sitting quietly next to me after you’ve made me a meal is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free ticket. You’ll be surprised how quickly I can forgive.

16. You did something hurtful. If I never bring it up, I’m considering leaving you.

17. I don’t read minds. Remember, I’m not a girl.

18. You may know fashion, but I wish you’d dress to please me, not other women.

19. If I’m losing my hair, it’s not funny. Would you like me to joke about your weight?

20. When I talk to you about golf and you act bored, it would be nice for you to remember all the times I listened to you talk about what is important to you.

26. I need some type of signal or cue to walk across the room and approach you. What if you’re married!?

27. It makes me feel like you trust me when you ask for my advice.

28. It feels competitive when you insist on being in charge.

29. Being respected is more important to me that being loved.

30. I want every guy to envy me when we arrive as a couple. Please don’t let yourself go.

31. When I’m upset I am very tone sensitive. How you say it is more important that what you say..

32. I hate it when you minimize/ignore my compliments. It makes me what to stop giving them.

33. I’m more insecure than you think. Why do you think I need your respect so much?

34. I don’t always know how I feel. That’s why I don’t tell you.

35. I don’t need you to do things for me. What I crave is being able to please you.

36. If I do one thing and say something contradictory – Go with my actions, that will always tell you what’s in my heart.

37. I find myself wanting to please you when you simply smile at me without asking for something. (Like a favor).

38. I really don’t want to hear about any of your ex-boyfriends, regardless of the point.

39. If I don’t share what I’m thinking it’s because I don’t think you will listen without interrupting.

40. I don’t like to argue and I don’t like to guess what’s wrong. Just tell me so I can fix it.

41. I love it when you put your hair in a pony tail. Yes, it’s a Freudian thing.

42. Don’t ask me, “Are you going to wear that?” when I’m already dressed.

43. A gentleman should always be respected by his lady in public, even if she is disagreeing with him.

44. If you don’t believe you’re pretty, you won’t believe me when I tell you, no matter how many times I say it.

45. It isn’t how much your weigh; what's attractive is whether body is proportionate.

46. Sometimes I have weird and strange thoughts. I don’t take them seriously and I don’t want to share them with you (or anyone).

47. Sometimes you really don’t want to know what I’m thinking. See above.

48. If you cheat on me, it is nearly impossible for me to get over it.

49. I don’t remember everything about our relationship and that doesn’t mean I don’t love you.

50. I need some time to myself to calm down when I’m upset so that I don’t say something I will regret.

Sah Sang Fans

2009-09-30T06:59:00.002+07:00

Who would you consider as the most hardcore fan of a celebrity? Someone who has watched every single one of their idols performances? Someone who spends 12 hours a day on the forums praising their idol? Someone who runs a website dedicated to their favorite celebrity? That probably is as far as a foreign fan of a Korean idol could go. A few crazed Korean fans, however, decided to take it another step - and follow their idol. By follow, I don't mean check up on the news about them every day and memorize the shows they'll be on - by follow, I mean physically follow them around. They're known as"Sah Saeng Fans" (사생팬), where Sah Saeng if short form of Sah Saeng Hwal which means "private life." As the term suggests, these girls' hobby is to observe the stars' personal lives. Let's take a look at some examples.

Jane, a high school student from Seoul, decided to attend DBSK's Chang Won concert. Most fans from Seoul took a train down there, but Jane and her 3 friends decided to take a cab. It ended up costing them 550k Won ($460), which is double the price of a bullet train ticket for four people. However, Jane thinks it was money well spent. Her cab followed the van that DBSK was in, and surely enough, the van pulled into a rest stop. The ride to Chang Won takes about 4-5 hours, and even DBSK needs to eat and use the washroom. Jane's cab followed the van into the rest stop, which is an ideal place for Sah Saeng fan because there aren't many other fans trying to get DBSK's attention and the tired manager doesn't show much hostility. Jane was lucky enough to pass her gift onto DBSK herself and even got to eat right beside them. Definitely worth the money, isn't it?

Jessica, a university student, was sitting in her car, parked outside of SS501's house as usual. That is when she spotted a member coming outside to enjoy a day off. She pursued the member quickly, and arrived at a cafe in Chung Dam Dong, where that member visits frequently. She was the first fan on the scene, and after sitting near the member, she decided to fool other Sah Saeng fans who would soon arrive there and spoil this precious chance to enjoy her oppa in peace. Jessica sent text messages to some other Sah Saeng fans she knew, saying "I think he went to Shin Sah area." The fans usually share their information, and surely enough, they were fooled by this false alarm. After successfully being the only fan in the cafe, she quietly took pictures of her oppa. Exclusive story, definitely worth the betrayal.

High school student Joanna has a special friend - a cab driver. But he is not an ordinary cab driver; he is what fans call "Sah Taek", a cab that specializes in following celebrities around. He sent a text to Joanna saying "So-and-so just went into a cafe in Ap Gu Jung", and she called him right away to Shin Chon, where she lives. It would normally take a cab an hour to get there from Ap Gu Jung, but her cab arrived in half an hour and took her to where the cafe is. Joanna was able to see her favourite oppa, and on that day she spent 50k Won ($42) on cab fare - Sah Taeks usually charge 30k Won per hour, much higher than ordinary cabs, but it was worth the money to her. Sah Taeks are never wrong, and she was willing to do whatever was necessary to get a real life view of her idol.

Although I listed two examples of high school students above, most fans in high school don't even dare to be a Sah Saeng fan - usually Sah Saeng fans are in their 20s, as they have the much more free time, disposable income and less restriction from home. They can also drive, giving them the mobility which is crucial in pursuits. They camp out in front of the stars' houses, the hair salon they go to, the TV station, wherever the star frequents. Sure, it costs a lot of time and money, and ordinary people don't view them so kindly. But before calling them "crazy," "creepy stalkers," take a moment and think; wouldn't some of YOU be willing to do the same if you lived in Korea and was given the opportunity?

(source : allkpop)

***

Seriously.. this Korean fans... they need to get a life (or a boyfriend/wife).

Gw ga kek gitu kok. Beneran!

I'm taking over

2009-09-25T11:18:00.003+07:00

Sesuai judulnya, I have taken over the laptop. THE LAPTOP IS IN MY HANDS ONCE AGAIN. YEAY!

Hahah!

Sebenernya ini cuma untuk perayaan berpindahtangannya laptop ke tangan gw lagi. Gila, kemaren saking senengnya bisa pegang laptop lagi, tiba-tiba gw dapet ide bikin blog baru lagi. And I really did it! Tapi cuma berisi video dan download links Super Junior. :P

Come by to my other blog. :P

Recent update :

Emang sih pasti repot dan gw ga gitu telaten ngurusin hal-hal berbau rutin kek gitu, ini blog aja kadang masih suka gw telantarin. Lumayan ironis karena gw paling nyaman sama hal-hal berbau rutin. Oh, well, I hope people would appreciate my new blog and think of it as a useful blog. Of course its a fangirling site so I don't really expect a couple of my friends would come and check it out cos it's my personal fangirling site and not all my friends like korean stuff. :P

Gw bolos ngantor hari ini. Dan kemaren. And guess what?! Gw ditelponin + sms-in, dicariin sama kasubbag keuangan gara-gara kerjaan gw ditinggal begitu aja padahal deadlinenya senen. Yeay! Meneketehe. Bukannya kemaren gw sms sekalian disuruh masuk gitu. Karena ga dikasih tau gw jadi ga tau kalo deadlinenya senen dan hari ini gw harus masuk. -_-

Oke, oke, gw nyari-nyari alesan. No matter what gw emang harus masuk hari ini, dengan mengorbankan ultahnya Septi karena duit gw ga cukup buat ke kantor dua kali DAN ke Depok buat ngerayain ultahnya Septi yang jelas lebih fun daripada diem di kantor ndirian. :|

Anyway, hape yang gw pengen beli sampe sekarang belom kebeli meskipun udah ampe minjem2 duit segala. -__-

Impusive buying... Hmm...the digital camera is calling me...

Bloodtype Characters

2009-09-24T23:05:00.003+07:00

What do you think my bloodtype is? LOL!

Ied Mubarak

2009-09-20T09:10:00.002+07:00

My mom and my sist after Ied pray. :)